JON MILLER

niggas insisting coming home to a bitch wife who “works” all day from home but still left the house a filthy mess because it was your turn to do the chores adds meaning to their life they never thought was possible. true love is eating dry ass chicken breast and the clump of rice she burnt bc she left the stove unattended to go bet all of your money on love island usa. but you’re realizing it’s delicious bc it’s hers? no that’s not going to cut it with me. but hey at least you get to tell your boss tomorrow that you have to leave work early to take your screaming daughter to afterschool dance lessons so she fulfill her lifelong dream of being a ballerina knowing full well she’ll actually just grow up to be a hoe…no one talks about life in that way unless they are trying to cope with their existence

okay facts

fuck i had a real point i was making with some structure on that post but i just hate him so much that i lost my train of thought

you can tell how fake the hype is when they start giving him the wrong glaze. for instance when he came on set and said “this is a show of maga republicans right?” …that’s really not THAT funny. it should go maybe into the charm bucket not the LMFAO HOLY SHIT MY SIDES bin. it’s something his handlers told him to say to disarm the hosts and let everyone know look i can have fun and am not scary. and with someone skillful it would be unquestionably read as that. but when you have a freakish frankenstein lab-made oaf like vance, his ballwashers first have to figure out which glaze to assign, and then still they get it mixed up often. they praise him as a family man of unshakable faith when he talks about how his wife refuses to leave eastern polytheism and assimilate despite living under his roof. he was lecturing the pope 2 months ago, like bro maybe worry about your hairy wife kneeling down to cows in the middle of the road before you act like you’re a respected enough family within the church to challenge its leader. maybe that flew at PJ Bixton’s church at the trailer park when the only time you ever saw your mother bow her head was when she was in a heroin nod but this is the actual church of Christ, and the ill fitting suit isn’t fooling anybody, you are still trailer fucking trash

i swear this effort to package vance and present him to us as this generational political talent is straight out of the twilight zone. you take this obese chud…and i don’t mean sturdy obese like trump or alex jones. but actually just mushy mashed potatoes chudlet obese, awkward, stutters when he speaks and has literally been pulled from diplomatic assignments because his interpersonal skills are so lousy that it would risk another world war. and then they say “man, oh man, he’s great at this. why, he’s the whole package: he’s got looks! charm! wit! authenticity! conviction!”

actually he didn’t, you fatass. he said mexicans bring their problems with them. they’re bringing drugs they’re bringing crime and they’re rapists. so idk where the fuck you got this “certain south american and central american countries” bc bro rolled down that escalator and said we’re building a wall to keep mexicans out

bro just say you can’t get any white bitches this doesn’t need to be a whole theory

it would happen a lot when like some teacher, professor, or other totally uninteresting character failed to hold my attention. and i’d be falling asleep but the dick be like okay well i’m awake asf rn nigga. now the no reason boner’s favorite posts are at airports/on planes, long drives, and then in locker rooms for some really odd reason

same tbh

okay does this bitch have zero fucking media training whatsoever? wtf is ts? hello yes hi lady, we are neck and neck here trying to take out this swarthy fucking animal shoeless joe from manali bro and you look like you just got through leadership institute’s “what should i do with my hands when i’m speaking?” breakout session at the cross creek cafe in west peachtree georgia. fucking kill me. did she go to the kyle langford school of autistic or just unprepared? holy disaster. she’s gaining ground among women voters, how?? either women are even more retarded than i imagined or they really just don’t want the show bobs and vagine candidate to win… regardless, we love you amy 😘 vote amy acton for ohio governor!

unironically i was eying that union jack chesterfield for a while from timothy oulton. i’d like to say thank you mr. boering for showing me how ghastly it is irl. it isn’t giving anglo-american sophistication, it’s giving waiting room at floyd’s 99 barbershop with millenials who own nfts and drink blantons waiting to get the macklemore haircut. bookshelves for gravitas, leather for authority, warm lighting for wisdom, all purchased from wayfair because he has none of the above. boering: a guy who wants to be seen as a statesman, an auteur, a cigar-club proprietor simultaneously but has succeeded only in looking like an upholstery catalogue. that hideous jacket? what is that “cabernet savignon”? ik in his head he looks like a serious intellectual on casual friday but in reality he just looks like a dumpy regional manager at a steakhouse chain. the dog is the most persuasive presence on the set. while every object around him screams desperately to communicate power, he alone possesses enough self-confidence to fall asleep to the tune of boering’s insufferable jewish drivel.

need to talk about this niggas performative ass disneyland set

the only way to get all green lights on the way home is when you have a text message you need to send

unironically the subtle nature of wilson’s untraditional interpretation is precisely why it’s so sinister. for instance, the very first line of the poem…yes, the definitions of “complicated man” and “man of many twists and turns” are basically identical on their face. but when you open up your translation with “mmkay ladies so let me tell you about this complicated guy” it hits a modern reader very differently than “sing to me o muse of the man of many twists and turns.” the word “complicated” is a step away from “problematic.” it’s not giving complex, rich, fascinating character. it’s signaling to the 21 year old college student that there are some red flags with this person. he’s “complicated” —that is never a good thing in 2026. and you scatter that kind of subtle coding throughout the epic, the rube says “well i don’t see no difference” but the feminist freshman walks away with a completely different understanding of the poem that bucks 2,000+ years of literary understanding.

why the fuck is yung putin passionately defending the emily fuckass wilson translation of the odyssey on x bro, did bro get married or some other such lamentable contretemps