๐ช๐ฃ๐๐๐ก๐ฉ๐๐ง๐๐ ๐จ๐ค๐ก๐๐๐โจ
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Unfiltered thoughts. Without pressure to make sense.๐ค
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You should feel how I feel when somebody says your name.
The second one is very rare, almost nonexistent.The last one, unfortunately, is my natural habitat.๐ญ
I write when I'm falling apart, when I'm falling in love or when I have a final tommorow and bunch of notes to study.
Repost from The Bored Therapist
#แ แญแฒ
" แจแฐแแแฃ แจแแ
แญแ แจแณแชแญ แแ
แฐแญ แจแแแฝแ แคแฐ แญแญแตแฒแซแ แ แแตแซแ แแจแซ แแตแฅ แซแแตแ แแฅแแแ แ แแณแฝแแแ แต แ แแ
แแ
แต แซแท แ แแฐแ แแตแฅ แแ แจแแธแแฏแ แ แแญ แ แ แญแฒ แแตแญ แ แฐแฐแแแ แจแแตแฐแแแ แ แฐแแ แแ แ แแแฝแแ แแกแ แแตแฅ 'แฅแตแจ แแผ?' แจแแ แจแแญแต แฅแ แจแแแ แฅแซแแ แแฅแฏแ " โฆ
" แ แแแแ แญแ
แแจแซ แฅแซแ แ แณแญแแ แฅแจแฐแ แ แแแฃแฑ แจแแแฝแ แฐแ
แแแต แจแแ แ แ
แ แฐแแแ แจแแตแแ แ แฐแซ แจแฐแฃแแฃแฝแ แจแธแฅแณ แ แซแแตแ แ แจแแแ
แฉ แซแแฝแ แแแแแฝ แจแแแ แ แแญ แณแชแญ แจแแ แญแแฝแ แ แฅแแฃแ แแแแฝแ แแแแฝ แฐแ
แแแต แ แแตแจแแแต แแ แแแ แญแ
แแ แจแฅแแต แฐแแฐแแต แ แแตแแแ แแแแแแฝแ แแแ แ แแ
แจแฅ แจแณแชแญ แฃแแแณแแต แตแตแ แแแต แ แคแฐ แญแญแตแฒแซแแฝแ แตแ แ แ แญแจแ แฅแแณแตแฃแแ "
- แฅแแ แแ
แฑแต แ แกแ แแตแซแต
"แ แคแต แแ
แจแตแ
แฅแแดแต แณแแ
แแ" was playing in the background when the lecturer ironically see the student cry in front of him because he let her add the course because she didnot submit assignment which was marked out of 10.
It takes strength to forgive,but i don't feel strong.
All Netflix and chill till I stress to death when the final is near ๐ญ
Repost from GlamVault
+3
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@glam_vault
"and my head is full of poison
and my heart is full of doubt
I got toxin in my blood stream"
To think that Iโm now living in my answered prayers.The things stressing me today are the very things I once prayed for.Last year around this time, I was terrified of what the future would hold, and now Iโm living in the future I once feared and hoped for at the same time.Itโs such a beautiful reminder of Godโs steadfast love and faithfulness.Iโm beyond thankful.โค๏ธ
Should have started studying organic chemistry in my mother's womb. What the hell is that?
"We canโt choose where we come from, but we can choose where we go from there."๐ค
As endless as it seems, though, we can break the cycle and be fulfilled from within, without heavily depending on our inner world on other peopleโs behavior. It is a good thing to notice patterns and realize that it is not your problem, but what happened to you, or how the people who gave birth to you were not responsible enough. But that is on them. Even if these patterns haunt our daily life, they can be broken.Though Iโm still learning how, and we will get there eventually. Just remember you are not alone in this journey.
Growing up without a parental figure makes you constantly wonder what is wrong with you that made them leave. What are the things you are missing that made them abandon you? You start to see yourself as incomplete because you never got to experience love. Watching other kids with their loving parents makes you envious. You always seek that figure outside of your home, in other people. When you lack it within them, you think you are the problem.
I thought I would get used to it and be okay with it, but then again, it shows up when you separate ways with people... when people get distant or don't want to do anything with you. Your inner wound gets triggered, and you are a 7-year-old again, thinking about what it is about you that is so unlovable and keeps pushing people away.
You will try to see your worth based on the number of people that wanted you or noticed you, because that is just a sign of reassurance for your inner child that you can be loved. But that comes with performance and sacrifice... the sacrifice of your needs or even yourself, just so you can feel the love you grew up seeking.
You will never feel fulfilled. You will spend your time thinking about what you should do to make people love you, so your life becomes a performance. But that is not right... you should be loved for being you, not for what you can contribute, you know? Love shouldn't be a reward. But then again, that feels like a fairytale for you, because you never experienced love without acting outside of your ways.
It is just a screwed, never-ending loop, and it sucks.
I love people who make you laugh until your cheeks hurt. People who let your inner child out. People who get you. People who let you be. Those with no forced interaction. Those you can sit with in silence. People with whom you can discuss anything.
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