اکنون در دسترس! پژوهش تلگرام ۲۰۲۵ — مهمترین بینشهای سال 
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پستهای کانال
| 2 | After coming to power in 1965, Ceausescu made a trip to China to met the Mao…
“How many Chinese, do you suppose, are opposed to your regime" Ceausescu asked Chaiman Mao
"Very few," said Mao. "Maybe 20 million. How about opposition to your rule in Romania?"
"Less," Ceausescu replied "maybe 19 million"
https://redd.it/1ud6zqj
@r_jokes | 27 |
| 3 | Did you hear the CEO of IKEA was recently elected president of Sweden?
He is currently assembling his Cabinet.........
https://redd.it/1ucunjv
@r_jokes | 41 |
| 4 | A Physicist's Proof that all Odd Numbers are Prime
1 - odd, prime
3 - odd, prime
5 - odd, prime
7 - odd, prime
9 - experimental error
11 - odd, prime...
https://redd.it/1ucvlro
@r_jokes | 45 |
| 5 | A girl tells her friend, "I met an exchange student last night. He's a !Kung tribesman from Namibia."
"How did you get along?" asks her friend.
And the girl says, "It was incredible. We just clicked."
https://redd.it/1ucrrp6
@r_jokes | 49 |
| 6 | The patient of a mental asylum is being interviewed by a doctor to see if he is fit for release.
Doctor: So, if you get out of here, what's the first thing you'll do?
Patient: I'm gonna get a slingshot and break every window in this goddam dump!
Doctor: Take him back!
After getting back to the main room, his friends advise him that he'll seem more normal if he talks about something like women at his next interview. So the next time, his interview goes like this:
Doctor: So, if you get out of here, what's the first thing you'll do?
Patient: I'm gonna go downtown and pick up a woman.
Doctor: Ah! And then what?
Patient: I'm gonna take her back to my hotel room.
Doctor: Yes, and then what?
Patient: I'll take off my clothes.
Doctor: Okay – and then?
Patient: I'll take off her clothes.
Doctor: And then?
Patient: I'll take the elastic out of her underwear to make a slingshot and break every window in this goddam dump!
https://redd.it/1uco313
@r_jokes | 46 |
| 7 | Having sex is like doing math
You add 2 hearts, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and pray you don’t multiply!
https://redd.it/1uc7buz
@r_jokes | 53 |
| 8 | What do you call a guy with two hands and three balls?
A juggler.
What do you call a guy with three hands and 5 balls?
>!inbred!<
Thank you. I made this joke 20 years ago in high school and wanted to share.
https://redd.it/1uchkxr
@r_jokes | 61 |
| 9 | A Texan walks into a pub in Ireland and shouts, “I hear you Irish are a bunch of hard drinkers!
I’ll put down $500 to anyone who can drink 10 pints back-to-back!”
The entire pub goes silent.
Nobody moves.
Then one Irishman quietly stands up, and walks straight out the door.
About 30 minutes later, he returns, taps the Texan on the shoulder, and asks, “That bet still good?”
“Sure is!” the Texan says.
The bartender lines up ten pints — full glasses from one end of the bar to the other.
Without a blink, the Irishman downs all 10 pints in a row and slams the last one down like a champion.
The bar ERUPTS with cheers.
The Texan pays the $500 — totally stunned.
He asks, “If you don’t mind me askin’, where’d you run off to for that half hour?”
The Irishman grins, “Oh, I just popped down to the pub around the corner to see if I could do it first.”
https://redd.it/1uce681
@r_jokes | 52 |
| 10 | How do you surprise a blind person?
Leave a plunger in their toilet.
https://redd.it/1uc7zem
@r_jokes | 44 |
| 11 | Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were playing golf one brisk March day.
One remarked to the second, "Windy, isn't it?"
"No," the second man replied, "It's Thursday."
And the third man chimed in, "So am I. Let's have a beer."
https://redd.it/1uc51jt
@r_jokes | 42 |
| 12 | I rented a limo for $500 and I just found out it doesn’t cover the cost of a driver
I spent all of that money and have nothing to chauffeur it
https://redd.it/1uc10yb
@r_jokes | 44 |
| 13 | My husband (of 40 years) & I were walking along the beach
A handsome young surfer with a tanned ripped body came running up a bit panicked and asked: "do you have the time"?
Admiring his toned muscular frame I replied: "if you have the energy".
And that is when the fight started.
https://redd.it/1ubw6oe
@r_jokes | 51 |
| 14 | A dung beetle walks into a bar and says to the bartender...
..."Excuse me, is this stool taken?"
https://redd.it/1ubsxmz
@r_jokes | 53 |
| 15 | Happy Father's Day....
...to all you mother fuckers
https://redd.it/1ubodq9
@r_jokes | 52 |
| 16 | A man arrives home from work all excited, pulls his wife into the bedroom, throws her on the bed and pulls the blankets over them... She was shocked as he hadn't been like this in years!
She was getting interested in what might happen next when he says "look, my new watch glows in the dark!"
https://redd.it/1ubo5zd
@r_jokes | 59 |
| 17 | How many dead prostitutes does it take to change a lightbulb?
Well I know it’s more than six because my basement is still dark.
https://redd.it/1ub2g6q
@r_jokes | 56 |
| 18 | An old man was celebrating his 100th birthday with his family.
One of them asked him if he had any worries about his health and future, and he replied:
"I have no worries at all! Statistically, very few people die between their 100th and 101st birthday!"
https://redd.it/1ubdc2y
@r_jokes | 60 |
| 19 | Why do Soviet policemen always patrol in groups of three?
One can read the orders.
One can write the arrest report.
And the third is from the KGB, keeping an eye on the two dangerous intellectuals.
https://redd.it/1ub8evk
@r_jokes | 56 |
| 20 | I said to my wife, "I want to marry another woman" Just to see her reaction.
On the first day, I saw nothing. Then on the second day, I still saw nothing. On the third day, I started to see a little with my left eye
https://redd.it/1ub9d4c
@r_jokes | 57 |
