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Weird Jokes & Memes

Weird Jokes & Memes

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Channel Posts
My wife just called me from her job at the Velcro factory. She's stuck at work.

2
I hate when people say 'bite me' and act all surprised when I actually do. https://weird-jokes.com/
I hate when people say 'bite me' and act all surprised when I actually do.Β  https://weird-jokes.com/
21
3
If you want space, join NASA. https://weird-jokes.com/
If you want space, join NASA.Β  https://weird-jokes.com/
47
4
At my interview I was asked, "If you could have a conversation with anyone, living or dead, who would it be?" Me, "The living one." πŸ€“ https://weird-jokes.com/
57
5
Falling in love makes you do stupid things. Once I even got married.
65
6
Why procrastinate today when you can procrastinate tomorrow? https://weird-jokes.com/
Why procrastinate today when you can procrastinate tomorrow?Β Β  https://weird-jokes.com/
64
7
I love having a job, I just don't like going. https://weird-jokes.com/
I love having a job, I just don't like going.Β  https://weird-jokes.com/
63
8
My wife and I are into S&M. She sleeps and I masturbate πŸ€“ https://weird-jokes.com/
71
9
A naked woman robbed a bank. Nobody could remember her face.
75
10
I don't make mistakes. I date them. https://weird-jokes.com/
I don't make mistakes. I date them.Β  https://weird-jokes.com/
73
11
I don't have trust issues, I have an excellent memory. https://weird-jokes.com/
I don't have trust issues, I have an excellent memory.Β  https://weird-jokes.com/
79
12
Having sex is a bit like playing bridge. If you don’t have a good partner, you’d better have a good hand. πŸ€“ https://weird-jokes.com/
84
13
Wife: I'm going to clone myself. Me: That would be just like you.
87
14
People say I act like I don't give a shit. I'm not acting. https://weird-jokes.com/
People say I act like I don't give a shit. I'm not acting.Β  https://weird-jokes.com/
85
15
This killing them with kindness is taking longer than I thought it would. https://weird-jokes.com/
This killing them with kindness is taking longer than I thought it would.Β  https://weird-jokes.com/
101
16
If you're ever lost in the woods, look for the North Star. Its twinkling will comfort you as you die. πŸ€“ https://weird-jokes.com/
89
17
Dream big. Fail bigger. https://weird-jokes.com/
Dream big. Fail bigger.Β  https://weird-jokes.com/
91
18
Maybe your cat is meowing because it wants a beer. https://weird-jokes.com/
Maybe your cat is meowing because it wants a beer. https://weird-jokes.com/
103
19
Take my advice. I'm not using it. https://weird-jokes.com/
Take my advice. I'm not using it. https://weird-jokes.com/
105
20
I bought my mother-in-law a chair for her birthday... But my wife wouldn't let me plug it in. πŸ€“ https://weird-jokes.com/
101