tiny canvas

going on an experimental evening walk. just a tiny monologue about the past pivots, and how i got the spark back for the 9th app we just started working on.

when i feel small, my world shrinks with me. when i feel big, my world expands as if there’s no limit. the space in between the small and big worlds is called life. and life is only worth something when i love myself. loving myself is the origin of happiness. without self-love, all gets lost. i promise myself i’ll love myself through my highs and lows. that’ll make room for me to fully love my family, friends, and pull me towards the masterpiece of lifetime.

raining in la. it's one of those days where imposter syndrome was creeping up on me. i didn't get to go outside today - ate healthy, worked out, cleaned, yet still felt a bit low for some reason. so i came out to a cafe, and now turned it around again. humming along some soft music. designing, talking to friends, writing, and reading. whenever i feel low for some reason, it's very helpful to come outside and do things. the last thing i should be doing is to be in a room by myself, slipping down the rabbit hole. friends, whenever you feel stuck, motion is lotion. as we move, we can figure things out and figure it all out. staying in that one spot rarely ever helps in such situation. every dreamer i've befriended goes through this. we can only feel low because we aim high.

i talk to myself a lot when i’m by myself. funky idea. if i were to schedule a live audio monologue of my thoughts re: dreams, startup, fundraising, pivot (what i already talk about here), i wonder how many would be interested

how clean my home is how consistently i can work out what i wear how i carry myself these are all reflection of my love for myself. without it, life turns into tasteless chaos. at the same time, doing all of the above well can help me love myself. it’s a cycle that’s hard to maintain and easy to break. gotta stay on top of it to up the chances

when i feel stuck, i could travel the world i could eat yum stuff i could party my ass off i could, i could, and i could but the truth remains. if the source of that feeling was pursuit of my life’s calling, it won’t go away. the only things that eased such feeling for me were trying things that at least aim for the same goal. even when it fails, it’s a fundamentally different feeling than not having tried at all

it’s very rare that an idea just forms on its own in my mind. whenever it strikes, i look back, and it’s direct or indirect reflection of what i’ve consumed learned, and lived. input output rule is very much on point when it comes to ideation

building a startup is like climbing two mountains at the same time and building a bridge inbetween. - mt 1: exciting, utopian - mt 2: practical, realistic at times it feels like having to look left and right at the same time

every time i build something new, it’s a humbling experience. aside from design, i spend far more than half my time on sales n marketing it to users. there’s really no room for ego. today’s been a day of up and down but fortunately i’m on the upside atm.

my first startup was “one minute.” it was like bereal but back in 2015. there was a clear smell of pmf in the way users thought of the app. it did well at first at a smaller scale of bereal, but looking back, from design to product thinking, i was much more inexperienced. with that said, bereal is likely pressured by limitation of mundane moments not being interesting enough most times - the same challenge i couldn’t overcome. https://x.com/andiecrispy/status/604956529129869312?s=46&t=ud-jFJ5v6eGAXzpCFZzFkA

the 4h offline detox + cafe date with my pen n note was a major win today. gotta do this more often. no phone/laptop distraction got me a couple breakthrough ideas. stark contrast my all time low yesterday from poor sleep. sleep + focus time is something neglected by many including myself. gotta get better at this.

re: stolen focus i used to write, doodle, ideate a lot on paper. ever since i started embracing design tools like figma, i started getting glued to the screen. while figma and digital notes do grant me the efficient and clean tool sets, they take away something that sits at the core of ideation. focus. it’s a different story when i have a packed agenda and trees to chop through - i get it done. at times of reorientation and pivots, at times of uncertainty, little red dots and interest magnets from all corners of the internet pulls my mind apart. ironically, what connects me to the world, the internet, also disconnects me from my present moment to focus. on weekends, i’m going to try dedicating at least half a day away from my phone and laptop. it’s me and my pen, dancing with crisp strokes in ink on my notebook. - just like the good old times when the world was my canvas.

the speakeasy bar where i hold a mental monologue. i wonder if i could evolve this to something bigger

this channel is the speakeasy bar of my online life. work network: linkedin, twitter, farcaster, email friendly work network: farcaster personal friends: imessage/insta dm/kakao

just starting to get out of the depressing rabbit hole that's been polluting my mind. 'is this what i wanna build for the next 10 years?' 'do i care enough?' 'what if it doesn't work?' all these are valid questions, but i realize unless i already have something in my mind that i keep obsessing over, it's better to act than think. because the best way for me to think, looking back, has always been when i'm slashing through the thought jungle by *acting on things. about to ship our 8th app of the year, with a healthy meal, solid work out, and a few sips of coffee, i'm wired in again. it's time to go. 2023 isn't over yet, and 2024 is starting soon. so many reasons to stay excited about myself. self-love is in the air