Date Tips™💡

About the value and devaluation of life experiences When people break up by rejecting, devaluing and demeaning each other, they are perhaps a little less hurt, since it is easier to part with something not really valuable or generally harmful. But, as part of a life strategy, devaluing is a waste of a resource. When we reject a person and the value of a relationship with that person, we reject the life experience gained in that relationship. And so life's time is wasted. How often do you hear: "I wasted so much time on that fool" or "I gave it my all”. ⠀ After all, what are we left with after the breakups that inevitably happen in life? What we are left with is life experience and the ability to apply it.

How to free up time? ⠀ ▫️ Planning. A necessary thing to allocate your time as efficiently and proportionately as possible. ▫️ Priorities. So, once you've written down all the things to do, you need to determine their level of importance. Consistency of priorities will play an important role in getting the job done efficiently. ▫️ Workplace. That’s definitely something worth paying attention to! Who would want to study in a mess? ▫️ Frog for breakfast. Sounds interesting, huh? In other words, make a habit of taking on the hard work right away first, not putting it off for later.

Motivation for action Imagine the end result of the goal, task, idea. Write it down. If necessary, find additional information about your goal/objective/idea, write down its implementation points. Write down a specific end goal with an "if-then" condition. For example, if you love to read books, but a lot of time wasted, set yourself the condition to read 100 pages a day for 14 days (if), than you can buy a new thing, which has long dreamed of. In the case where you are overcome by laziness, and you can not bring yourself to act, imagine what would happen if you do not complete the task. For example, if you do not wake up at 6 a.m., then you will long nag yourself for your weak will.

How to behave on a first date? In order for the first date not to be the last, you need to understand a few simple rules👇🏻 ▫️ Stay confident. It's okay to be nervous on a first date. Acting confident, being yourself is the surest way to look natural. ▫️ Dress appropriately. Usually on a first date a man looks at a woman from head to toe, and she tries to impress him. ▫️ Take care when choosing a fragrance. Without knowing your date's preferences, choose unobtrusive light scents for yourself ▫️ Don't be a drag. Don't burden him with your problems and don't complain. ▫️ Be easy and have fun conversations about simple everyday topics. ▫️ Take off the rose-tinted glasses. Do not embellish the image of a man, do not praise him, do not make long-range plans for him. If the date was interesting for you, don't forget to thank for an enjoyable time.

How to learn to say "no"? A person who finds it hard to refuse others is a really handy person. You can dump a lot of work on him, he won't say no to loved ones, always come to the rescue, give help, lend money. What to do? Start with a small, very first "no"! And then, it's worth continuing, asserting this skill👇🏻 ▫️ Give yourself permission not to be "all good." Give yourself permission to act in your own best interest. ▫️ Practice saying "no" to strangers - store clerks, waiters, neighbors. ▫️ Choose a form of rejection that is acceptable to you. Sharp, soft, humorous or serious - there are many options. ▫️ Fear of rejection is the fear of being judged. Judged, so what? It's just the opinion of others... Sure, there will be people who won't accept you with your "no," even those close to you won't like it. But those who care about you, who want to be there for you, who respect you, will always be around.

What does a person prone to co-dependency look like? In fact, such a person is quite easy to recognize. A co-dependent person in a relationship will try: ▫️Make his partner happy even if it violates his principles. ▫️Ignore own desires, thoughts and needs, for the sake of the other. ▫️Adjusts to the mood of another. ▫️Avoids conflict emphatically. ▫️The typical response of a co-dependent to the question, "What do you want to do today?" Sounds something like, "I don't care, what do you want to"? Recognize yourself? No? Then I'm glad for you. And if you're ready to accept the presence of a couple or three points in yourself, you should think about it and start working on your mistakes.

Freedom or Discipline What to choose: doing things by mood or by schedule❓ The truth is one. Discipline is your conscious freedom. Some people like to keep plans and strive to be productive every day. But many get lost in the wrong approach as they don't master time management and don't know what they ultimately want and where their path will lead them. Constant workloads and excessive self-demanding lead to worse results. Other people make the mistake of thinking that the decisions they make in the moment depending on "want" and "can" will lead to anything at all. They live out the illusion of their work, even though the work itself is done incorrectly and disorganized. Finding balance is about finding yourself and your purpose, which are in unified harmony, under your own self.

Perception of praise All things truly marvelous are complete and perfect on their own, with no praise in them: they are neither made worse nor better by praise. This also holds true for what is commonly called beautiful, be it the creatures of nature or art, for the truly magnificent needs what? No more than law, no more than truth, no more than devotion and modesty. Of this, which will adorn praise, which will spoil scolding? Is the emerald become worse when it is not praised?

THE BASIC WOES OF OUR TIME The major evils of our time stem not from our moral depravity but, on the contrary, from our often misguided moral enthusiasm - our desire to build a better world. Our wars are essentially religious ones. They are wars between proponents of competing theories about how to build a better world. Our moral enthusiasm is often misguided, for we fail to recognize that our oversimplified moral principles are often hard to adapt to the complex political situations we are applying them to.

Desire to control everyone and everything all the time This wish can be dictated by perfectionism, egocentrism, lack of trust and a variety of other reasons. But all these consequences have a common cause - a violation of attachment in childhood: at some point the child ceased to feel secure around his parents. He stopped trusting this world and feeling relaxed. Growing up, such children rely only on themselves. It would seem that this is absolutely "great". But there is a flip side of the coin: even when they need help, they do not ask for it, being afraid to admit to themselves some weakness. Such adults live in a state of constant tension and expect some kind of trick from the world.

What is being conscious? It is being in clarity. In such a state, you own awareness of the self, when sensations are manifested but not overwhelming, and you just observe.⠀ ⠀ Watch yourself from the outside, your reactions, your surroundings.

The only thing worse than an idler is a workaholic! Our body is not "confined" to work 24/7 - it needs to recover. If you don't track the moment when work absorbs all your thoughts and free time, you can "catch" a lot of negative consequences: from problems in your personal life to depression.

Few healthy habits for a quality life ✔️Try not eating at night and falling asleep with an empty stomach, and within 1-2 weeks you’ll have light light dreams and wake up every morning in a good mood with inspiration to do something. ✔️Try not drinking lemonades and any carbonated drinks bought at the store, and you’ll see how delicious plain water tastes. ✔️Try taking an apple/mandarin/orange/banana or drinking a glass of water every time you want to take a cigarette, and in 2 weeks you’ll feel twice as strong, sturdier and stronger. ✔️ Try turning off the TV and computer an hour or two before bedtime, and you'll start to see your desires and creative impulses.

Skills worth developing - Living in the present moment. 🔸We, living in big cities, are rarely stay in the present moment. 🔸Most of the time we don't notice what we're doing and think about something else. - Being honest with ourselves. 🔸Recognizing you're wrong is especially hard, but everyone makes mistakes without exception. 🔸Worst of all, you don't recognize them or learn any lessons from them.

It's so much like people... Waiting for happiness. I'll get my dream job and everything will change❗️ I'll meet a real man and he'll make me happy❗️ We're always waiting for him or her to be better, more responsible, more purposeful and then we'll be HAPPY. But alas, our partners or circumstances don't make us happy. If there is no feeling of harmony in our hearts, our acceptance of ourselves, understanding of our own wishes and goals, then nothing can make us happier. So, if you want to be happy, start with yourself!

Psychosomatics - HOW IT WORKS Our feelings and emotions are expressed through facial expressions, gestures, tension or relaxation of body muscles, and chemistry within the body. These affect the organs. Which, in turn, have a margin of safety. Each organ has its own. Initially, so-called "functional impairment" of the organ takes place. Meaning, one has a symptom with no obvious cause (lesions, diseases detected by tests and examinations). Such symptoms are a signal that the emotional response is excessive and overwhelming. Then the functional disorders develop into "organic damage," this leads to chronic disease.

Fruitful timing For 5-10 minutes before diving into a deep sleep, our subconscious mind is ready to take in essential information, process it, and give clues. Dedicate these minutes to analyzing the day's victories, self-involvement techniques for positive attitudes, watching helpful videos, and spiritual practices.

Professionalism and awareness It's a lot of hard work. The need to make unpopular decisions. Taking emotional risks and stepping out of your comfort zone. Standing your ground. Mostly unawareness. Doing, redoing, inventing. And to face again the field of your ignorance, which is the wider the circle of light that stands out from the darkness with your attention.

Envy has many masks While we don’t want to feel it, because envy is poor, shameful, low and sometimes unbearable. We hide our envy from ourselves, calling it by different names, forbidding ourselves to feel it in order to think well of ourselves. As a result, we feel emptiness, incomprehensible sadness and anger. We are afraid of envy of others in his address, since that’s dangerous feeling, and it’s better to keep quiet about their successes. Otherwise, suddenly we’ll be devalued, become objects of anger and ridicule.

Smart people say: don't compare yourself with others But no matter what heights of awareness we have reached, willingly or unwillingly, consciously or subconsciously, we still compare ourselves to others. Since behind it is an evolutionary mechanism pop up that ensures our survival. And what matters here is not "why," but "what we have as a result" of such a comparison. As a result, we get different feelings, the most "popular" of which is envy.