Dires

Daughter Brings Home New Rules After College DEAR : My younger daughter, "Bree," recently moved back into my home after her graduation from university. She's very opinionated and wants things her way. My other daughter, "Tami," will be visiting and would like to bring along her new Yorkie, which is fully housebroken. I don't mind as long as the dog stays off the furniture. Bree doesn't like animals indoors (because of negative experiences with a prior roommate's dog) and has forbidden it. I let her know that this is MY home and she may not "forbid" anything. It blew up into a huge thing, and now Tami has second thoughts about her visit and wants to cancel. Help! -- FUR BABY FIASCO IN NEW MEXICO DEAR FIASCO: Inform Bree, whose sense of entitlement is eyebrow-raising, that she owes her sister an apology for the way she behaved. Reiterate that this is your home and you, not she, will decide who may visit. Then set a realistic date after which Bree should be living independently, because if you don't, she may wind up ruling your roost -------------- @Dires @Dires @Dires ----------------------------------- ⭕⭕ ⭕️⭕️ @IELTS_Council

Daughter Brings Home New Rules After College DEAR : My younger daughter, "Bree," recently moved back into my home after her graduation from university. She's very opinionated and wants things her way. My other daughter, "Tami," will be visiting and would like to bring along her new Yorkie, which is fully housebroken. I don't mind as long as the dog stays off the furniture. Bree doesn't like animals indoors (because of negative experiences with a prior roommate's dog) and has forbidden it. I let her know that this is MY home and she may not "forbid" anything. It blew up into a huge thing, and now Tami has second thoughts about her visit and wants to cancel. Help! -- FUR BABY FIASCO IN NEW MEXICO DEAR FIASCO: Inform Bree, whose sense of entitlement is eyebrow-raising, that she owes her sister an apology for the way she behaved. Reiterate that this is your home and you, not she, will decide who may visit. Then set a realistic date after which Bree should be living independently, because if you don't, she may wind up ruling your roost -------------- @Dires @Dires @Dires ----------------------------------- ⭕⭕ ⭕️⭕️ @IELTS_Council

Teen Tries To Manage Stress About College  DEAR : I'm an 11th-grader. My parents have been putting massive amounts of pressure on me about college, and it's stressing me into oblivion. When I try to talk to them about it, they tell me I should be, and already should have been, more involved in my college applications process, academics and preparing for college. They say those should be my top priorities right now, and have gone so far as to restrict what I can do -- getting a job, hanging out, extracurriculars, etc. How do I get them to lay off? -- BURNED-OUT IN SOUTH CAROLINA DEAR BURNED-OUT: A way to do that would be to show your parents the extent to which you are working on your college applications as well as your grade point average. They are trying to make you focus because they fear you won't be accepted if you don't. If the pressure is really too much for you, discuss this with a counselor at school, so that person can intercede for you. -------------- @Dires @Dires @Dires ----------------------------------- ⭕⭕ ⭕️⭕️ @IELTS_Council

Mother's Desire To Unplug From World Sparks Backlash  DEAR : I am a single, stay-at-home mom of a special needs 14-year-old. I also take care of my elderly father. When life starts to overwhelm me, I tend to isolate myself to focus on taking care of my son and Dad and taking care of my mental health. I haven't even been on social media in three years. Because of it I have lost touch with many friends and family members. I'm now being called "antisocial" and a few other not-so-nice names. How can I get people to understand that this is how I handle stress and it has nothing to do with them? -- STRESSED-OUT IN CALIFORNIA DEAR STRESSED-OUT: Explain, as you have to me, that when you become stressed, your coping mechanism is to isolate yourself, and your silence is not meant to be offensive. If you are told your silence was hurtful, apologize and point out that because you are stretched thin, sometimes you are overwhelmed and need to quietly recharge. Many people cope with stress the way you do. If it works for you, more power to you. -------------- @Dires @Dires @Dires ----------------------------------- ⭕⭕ ⭕️⭕️ @IELTS_Council

DEAR ABBY: A year ago I discovered that I have a talent for creating a unique type of art which is marketable. At a holiday market in which I participated, a customer commissioned me to make two pieces for her. She also advised me on how I should market my art. I listened patiently but had no intention of following her advice. When she came to my home to pick up the pieces, she brought three of her friends along and began advising me again. This time, she mentioned that when a person brings a group of purchasing customers (as these ladies were ... they bought nearly everything I have), I should ALWAYS offer a little "gift" to the person bringing the customers (i.e. one of my pieces as a token of gratitude). Abby, I consider what I do to be my business now. I'm not selling cosmetics or kitchenware for another company. I don't think I have ever gone to any market with friends and asked the seller to give me a token for bringing friends who bought something. Is this what I should do? Please enlighten me. -- BUDDING ARTIST DOWN SOUTH DEAR ARTIST: Someone who helps you to increase your business should be thanked for their effort -- as long as it is you and not the other person who is deciding on what is appropriate. Whether this comes in the form of a verbal expression of gratitude or something tangible is up to you. While on one hand I think it was nervy of the woman to spring this on you, on the other I can't help thinking that business is business -- and this is a way of promoting it. Consider offering the woman a future discount. -------------- @Dires @Dires @Dires ----------------------------------- ⭕⭕ ⭕️⭕️ @IELTS_Council

DEAR ABBY: My fiance and I were having dinner at a nice restaurant when a woman came up to him. It turned out she was a former girlfriend of his. When she looked at me questioningly, he introduced me as his "friend"! I reintroduced myself to her as his fiancee. She then looked back at him and said, "Oh. Congratulations," and walked away. For the first time, I'm seriously considering not marrying this guy. What do you think? -- MORE THAN A FRIEND IN TEXAS DEAR MORE: What happened is a red flag. I think your fiance has a lot of explaining to do. Start the discussion with, "I am not your 'friend,' I am your fiancee!" I wouldn't blame you for making this a loooong engagement. It seems you need to get to know him better. -------------- @Dires @Dires @Dires ----------------------------------- ⭕⭕ ⭕️⭕️ @IELTS_Council

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