Ada Ujaligwa Parenting Channel
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Bringing clarity, positivity and intentionality to parenting
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Kanal postlari
+4
Chuchuβs face said everything.
The moment he unwrapped his very first personal smartphone, a brand new iPhone 16, the emotions were impossible to miss.
He lifted me off the ground.
He covered my face with kisses.
He even shed a few tears of joy.
For him, this wasnβt just a phone.
It was an 18-year wait.
Months ago, he told me he preferred an iPhone to an Android.
So despite the cost, I got him exactly what he wanted.
One thing I have always believed is this:
When I give a gift, I give people what they want for themselves, not what I want for them.
But the real story isnβt the iPhone.
The real story is what happened before it.
For six years of secondary school, Chuchu did not own a personal smartphone.
Not because we couldnβt afford one.
Not because he didnβt ask.
Not because every other child didnβt have one.
He was quite possibly the only student in his school without a personal smartphone.
And that decision was intentional.
I wanted to protect his attention before the world started competing for it.
I wanted to delay his exposure to the darker corners of the internet.
I wanted him to focus on books before algorithms.
Real friendships before online validation.
Character before convenience.
I wanted him to learn one of lifeβs most important lessons:
You do not have to own what everybody else owns to succeed.
You do not have to follow the crowd to belong.
And there is absolutely nothing wrong with being different when being different is the right thing.
Today, at 18, he has earned that freedom.
The tears were not because he got an iPhone.
The tears were because he understood that some gifts are more valuable when they are delayed.
What is one thing you refused to give your child early, even when everyone else was doing it?
Register for batch 10 Ada Ujaligwa Parenting course now. I am registering batch 10 now
See link in comment section
Chineke Daalu oππ½β€οΈ
Β©AU2026
#intentionalparentingbyadaujaligwa
#adaujaligwa
#adaujaligwaparenting
#positiveparenting
#consciousparenting
#christianparenting
#godlyparenting
#chinekedaalu
| 2 |  I am super excited for Chuchuπ€£π€£π€£π€£π€£
He turned 18 years old in January 2026
He graduated from secondary school in May 2026
He is getting his first personal smartphone in June 2026
He had been asking me all week what day I will give him his smartphone
I told him to be patient small
I told him before this week runs out he will get his smartphone
He doesnβt know I bought it since and I have kept it for him waiting for today to come
I am so happy I was able to stay on course despite the ferocious pressure he put on me to give him a smartphone
He spent 6 years in secondary school and was the only child in his whole school who didnβt get a smartphone throughout secondary school
Every other child had a smartphone from first year except him β¦.. He was the odd one out and he struggled so much with accepting that. But I refused to budge because I know he will learn so much from that experience if I do not give in. I maintained my boundaries and my steeze π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£
He cried, crewed and crowedβ¦. Thankfully his father supported my decision β¦. So we were on the same page on the issue. That made my position stronger.
I told him it was ok to be different
Your validation should not come from what you own
You must not have what everyone else has if that thing is not necessary for your wellbeing, growth and development
Stand alone if what you are standing for is the right thing
Learn to be content with what you have.
Let your happiness not be centered around material possession
Most importantly I am your mother, I know that owning a personal smartphone and being on social media at less than 18 years will do you more harm than good, it will distract you, it will derail you, it will reduce your capacity to pay attention and learn, it will affect your mental health, it will make you an angry emotionally dysregulated child, and it will most likely get you into avoidable trouble, you do not need a personal smartphone to make progress or grow well or be happy, when it is time to get you a personal smartphone, you are much better off without a personal smartphone until you are 18 yrs old and you are done with secondary school. Then I will buy you one without wasting time
He is about to receive his first ever smartphone today at over 18 yrs oldππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½
Guess which phone I bought for him
Android or IPhone
Guess?
Meanwhile my batch 10 Ada Ujaligwa Parenting course is launching and I am still enrolling people
I will teach you the strategies I used in achieving this outcome if you want to learn to do so
Many parents struggle to remain firm under pressure from their children and peers
Peer pressure makes many parents abandon what they know is right for their children β¦. They give into pressure so much even when they know itβs the wrong thing to do
Peer pressure does not affect me in my parenting at all
If I stand on something right in my parenting. I am immovable π
See link in comment section to register now
Chineke Daalu oππ½β€οΈ
Β©AU2026
#intentionalparentingbyadaujaligwa
#adaujaligwa
#adaujaligwaparenting
#positiveparenting
#consciousparenting
#christianparenting
#godlyparenting
#chinekedaalu | 448 |
| 3 |  +2BEHOLD THE LATEST MOTHER OF 2 MEDICAL DOCTORS
Call me Nne Doc Squared ππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½
I am on my way to attend the graduation ceremony of my daughter Nnemma who is now a MEDICAL DOCTOR
The 2nd Medical Doctor to come from my womb
Oh my God oooooπππππππ
You do this one oππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎ
Oh oh oh ohβ¦. You do this one oh ππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎ
Faithful God ππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎ
Chineke Daalu oππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎ
All the investment into her education that her father and I made
Has come to tremendous fruition as our daughter graduates as a Medical Doctor | 486 |
| 4 |  +3First pictureβ¦. The first morning after we arrived Turkey β¦.. We got up and Ebuuu nwa made both our bedsβ¦. Even though they have a daily cleaning service, he insisted on making our beds rather than leave it messy till the cleaner arrives.
I told him he doesnβt have to make the beds since we were in a 5 star hotel work cleaning services but he made it anyway.
He said he already has that habit down to a T from home training so he canβt just leave the bed like that waiting for cleaners
Second to fifth pictureβ¦. This morning when we woke up, we woke up nearly in the afternoon because we went to bed late last night
So as soon as we got up, cleaner arrived to make the bed. Ebuuu nwa couldnβt stand and allow the cleaner to make the bed. Ebuuu nwa joined the cleaner to make the bedπππππβ¦. Cleaner was shocked and started laughing, speaking Turkish and pointing at Ebuuu whilst talking gibberish to me. She was evidently shocked that a guest who should stand back, relax and be pampered was helping the cleaner to make bed
The expression on the cleanerβs face was βWhich kain tin be this, wetin consain guest with bed making when they have paid to stay in a place laidisβ
I joined her in laughing too
Ebuuu said he felt uncomfortable watching the cleaner make the bed without giving her a helping hand and that afterall it was us that slept on the bed so na we suppose make the bed
Tohhhhhhβ¦. Na home training in action be this
My mama heart was overjoyed that my boy child even outside home is demonstrating the training abc upbringing he got at home effortlessly
Ada Ujaligwa Parenting teaches you how to raise children whose home training will be solid
We are enrolling batch 10 now
See link in comment section to register now
Chineke Daalu oππ½β€οΈ
Β©AU2026
#intentionalparentingbyadaujaligwa
#adaujaligwa
#adaujaligwaparenting
#positiveparenting
#consciousparenting
#christianparenting
#godlyparenting
#chinekedaalu | 716 |
| 5 |  Association of Naija women who cannot post picture of them wearing bikini or swim suit without covering the lower part with something one cloth or the other
Gather here let us take selfie π€£
I have nothing against those who can post bikini and swim suit pictures β¦β¦ I admire their pictures so much
I wear swim suit, I prefer them to bikini, so I donβt wear bikini, itβs like wearing pant and bra outside in public and I no fit π©
I wee just be seeing my parents faces frowning at me β¦. Kpe how can we wear just underwear and step out in publicπ
Home training no go allow meβ¦. The influence of my parents in my life even at 50 is overriding!
At least swim suit covers you more that bikini β¦.. Buy when I take pictures with it, I cannot post it, except I cover the lower half of my body so my Daddy and my Mummy will not be disappointed with meπ
Because of my parents I cannot behave anyhow both in real life and on social media, I cannot come on social media to behave anyhow or talk anyhow or use certain languages or wear anything π
I fear disappointing my parents so much π©
They built a solid legacy I must continue
This is the power my parents have over me
At 50 years of age, what my parents would say still means everything to me. My father has passed on yet he is still parenting me at 50. I cannot do anything he does not approve of. My mother can still tell me to remove something I am wearing and I will remove it even when I donβt agree. Even if I donβt like what she wants me to do, I still find myself doing it. I wonβt just have peace until I do it. Especially because I trust they will never mislead me. Infact I know they will never mislead me.
Strong parental influence is everything
Yesterday one of my adult children said to me βYou know I canβt disobey youβ
I responded βBut you know I will never mislead youβ
They said βEven if you mislead me I will still obey youβ
We both started laughing so hard πππππππ
It seems I now have the same powerful influence my parents have over me over my children too
It seems I have the kind of influence over my children like my parents have over me
You see home training
The kind that makes you influence your children in adulthood so that even in adulthood, they will still listen to you when it matters most and they will continue to make choices that will not bring you disappointment at a time when they can choose not to listen to you and nothing with happen
If you get it right as a parent, you have won
In my batch 10 parenting, I teach you skills on how to develop that kind of powerful influence in the lives of your children even when they are adults
You donβt have to force them to listen to you
They will simply choose to listen to you
If you want that kind of influence in the lives of your children, register now in my batch 10 Ada Ujaligwa Parenting course using the link in the comment section below
Chineke Daalu oππ½β€οΈ
Β©AU2026
#intentionalparentingbyadaujaligwa
#adaujaligwa
#adaujaligwaparenting
#positiveparenting
#consciousparenting
#christianparenting
#godlyparenting
#chinekedaalu | 642 |
| 6 |  Protected children today become broken adults tomorrow.
If nobody can correct your child you are not raising a child
You are raising an ego
Wise parenting is simple:
Pause
Investigate
Correct
Reinforce values
You are not raising a child for your house
You are raising a human for the real world.
My batch 10 Ada Ujaligwa Parenting is currently registering
I teach parents how to successfully raise well behaved children
See link in comment section to register
Chineke Daalu oππ½β€οΈ
Β©AU2026
#intentionalparentingbyadaujaligwa
#adaujaligwa
#adaujaligwaparenting
#positiveparenting
#consciousparenting
#christianparenting
#godlyparenting
#chinekedaalu | 560 |
| 7 |  Yesterday I walked into my house and saw what we all pray for as parents play out
Not perfectionβ¦. But sound character
I stepped into the kitchen
Ebube was there
He didnβt wait
He didnβt dodge
He didnβt pretend nothing happened
He looked at me and said:
βMummy, I broke your βWho send youβ glass cup while washing the dishesβ¦ it slipped. Iβm sorry.β
No excuses
No lies
No delay
Just truth
Before I could even process it, he added:
βIβve already decided Iβll go to the shop tomorrow and replace it.β
That right there⦠is training showing up.
Because letβs be honest
Most people donβt struggle with mistakes
They struggle with ownership
They will hide it
Deny it
Shift blame
Or keep quiet and hope nobody notices
But this boy
Confessed without pressure
Owned it without prompting
And moved to fix it without being told
I told him, βItβs okay, just be more careful next time. You people have almost finished my βWho send youβ cups in this house.β
But inside me
I was deeply satisfied
Because I didnβt raise children who fear me
I raised children who respect truth
My children know one thing clearly
You will never be punished for telling the truth
But you will always face consequences for lying
So they chose early
Truth is safer
Truth is smarter
Truth is better
And today?
He didnβt just talk
He went out after work
And bought TWO cups
Not because I demanded it
But because he understands something many adults still donβt
If you break it
You fix it
That is character
Character is not big grammar
It is not motivational quotes
It is not church activity
Character is simple
Say βI did itβ when you did it
Say βItβs my faultβ when youβre wrong
Fix what you damaged
Donβt wait to be chased before you do the right thing
That is integrity
And the truth is
Many grown adults still cannot do this
They are old
But not responsible
They are loud
But not accountable
They are present
But not dependable
So when you see a child doing it effortlessly
Pay attention
That is intentional parenting at work
By the grace of God
I am not just raising successful children
I am raising children you can trust with truth
With responsibility
With life
Chineke Daalu oππ½β€οΈ
Β©AU2026
#intentionalparentingbyadaujaligwa
#adaujaligwa
#adaujaligwaparenting
#positiveparenting
#consciousparenting
#christianparenting
#godlyparenting
#chinekedaalu | 537 |
| 8 |  +1That was how my daughter Nnemma also paid for me to have massage therapy when we went for a little girlβs trip
When I tell you there is an art to raising children who will grow up to want to spoil you wonβt good life, best believe it is a skillβ¦..
One person raises generous children who are super affectionate and want to care for them and show up for them
Another person raises stingy children who find it so hard to bring out money to take care of their parents and show up for them
Majority of the time, it is not coincidence
It is not random
It is skill
It is intentionality
I want you to learn that skill so you will raise highly generous children who will shower you with love and gifts after you have raised them through the grace, mercy and favour of God
Register for batch 10 parenting now ππ½ https://adaujaligwaparenting.selar.co/successfulparenting | 617 |
| 9 |  A daughter like Nnemma
Who can find?
She is spoiling me with so much love πππππππ
A few days ago she called me and it turned out I was doing my nails, she asked how much it cost, I told her and she sent me the money with this beautiful message attached πππππππ
Faithful God ππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎ
Chineke Daalu oππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎππΎ
Ada Ujaligwa Parenting is so grateful to God for the parenting skills that produced these amazing results
My batch 10 parenting course is registering now
See link in comment section to register
Chineke Daalu oππ½β€οΈ
Β©AU2026
#intentionalparentingbyadaujaligwa
#adaujaligwa
#adaujaligwaparenting
#positiveparenting
#consciousparenting
#christianparenting
#godlyparenting
#chinekedaalu | 477 |
| 10 |  +7The Chineke Daalu Family celebrated the confirmation ceremony of our last child and baby of the house Keekee
I canβt believe that all my children are now fully confirmed in the Catholic Church
All of them have been baptised, received Holy communion and are all confirmed now
They have all received the gift of the Holy Spiritβ¦. Wisdom, Understanding, Counsel, Knowledge, Fortitude, Piety and the fear of God
If you are a Teacher and you are still teaching only in a physical classroom, you are failing to tap into the digital economy, then you will remain very poor
Teaching that subject you teach in primary and secondary school online to students who live abroad is how many teachers have blown
The teaching opportunities on the internet is huge
Many teachers are combining it with their physical job in a school and are making more than 1M a month
So I donβt know how you can know this and not join the free class that will teach you how you to position yourself to teach globally and earn internationally
Call every teacher you know to run to Uneke Chinenye Abigail Samuel
She is holding a totally free class tomorrow
Join link in comment section below ππ½ | 591 |
| 11 |  Raising children who are so domesticated is an important skill many parents need. The skill of being able to cook out native food even in the abroad is something I am passionate about teaching my children.
What native foods can your teenage or young adult child cook independently
To raise emotionally stable highly responsible well behaved children who are massively skilled domestically and can hold down a home even in your absence
Register in batch 10 Ada Ujaligwa parenting course now
See link up Register
Chineke Daalu oππ½β¦. I am Ada Ujaligwa Parenting | 472 |
| 12 |  The levels we are in now in parenting
Prof and I can be traipsing around the world and one of our children will be in the kitchen cooking stew their siblings will eat
Faithful God ππ½
This was Ebuuuu texting me on WhatsApp that he just finished cooking stew
He said tomorrow he will cook soup
Let him rest from the stew he cooked
Standing up to cook the stew hurt his feet π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£
So my Ajebo nwa wants to rest before he cooks the soup the next day π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£
Check out the correct stew he cooked for the family
Train your children early to start taking over the cooking at home
He was meant to cook both stew and soup on the same day but after cooking the stew his feet were βwreckedβ π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£
So he is taking a break β¦. He will now cook the soup tue next day
Dear parents, pls start when they are small to involve them in house chores and cooking
Stop waiting till they are grown before you do it
Else it will be hard to drill it into them
Now it is normal for my children
It is second nature to them
In my batch 10 Ada Ujaligwa Parenting I teach you how to start early to raise your children to be resourceful and usefulful and skilful in the home and how to build a solid relationship with them through strong emotional connection so that disciplining them will come much easier for you
See link in comment section to register now
Chineke Daalu oππ½β€οΈ
Β©AU2026
#intentionalparentingbyadaujaligwa
#adaujaligwa
#adaujaligwaparenting
#positiveparenting
#consciousparenting
#christianparenting
#godlyparenting
#chinekedaalu | 563 |
| 13 | As you know Keekee is finishing primary school this year
She is going into secondary school God willing in September
Last year we applied to secondary schools for admission
And she was offered admission by the one she wanted to attend the mostβ¦.. Chineke Daalu ππ½
In the last few days we have been choosing subjects they will do in secondary school
And the Principal just said that doing βScienceβ as a subject in JS 1 is optional. The Principal explained that some parents of previous JS 1 students 2 years ago said that they donβt want their children doing science because it is hard and they donβt want their children doing subjects they find hard
I was shocked
So were other parents
We are all in a parents WhatsApp group for their class in primary school. All of them in that their class in primary school are going to the same secondary school on September God willing so we love it
The same parents group in primary school will be the same parents group in secondary school
This is what I wrote in the WhatsApp group β¦. Find it below as follows
βThis is the mistake some parents and teachers keep making
Making like too easy for children
It will deprive the children of the opportunity to develop resilience as a life skill
Why stop a child from trying a subject just because they might find it hard
What if they find it hard????β¦. And so what????β¦. Will they be protected from everything hard in life????β¦. Will life always be easy for them????β¦. How ca they then learn to cope with when things are hard when they keep being saved and prevented from doing hard stuff
So what if they donβt find it hard at all
Or what if they find it hard initially but they now figure out how to make it a bit easier???
I donβt like that schools are colluding with some parents to rob children of the opportunity to develop resilience
I donβt like it when children are prevented from coping with needful discomfort that will build resilience and coping skills
This is one of the reasons the mental health of children in this generation is getting poorer and poorer
Because life is being made too easy for them when they are young
And it is artificial ease because the reality is that life will not be easy all the time
The danger of overprotecting children from discomfort or from βhard thingsβ is that when they become adults they expect life to keep being easy just like their portended made it easy for them but it wonβt be
We all know that
So the earlier parents allow their children to do hard things that are beneficial to their development from an early age, the better their mental health as adults will be
Many children of this generation will not be able to cope with real life when they become adults
Any little thing they start shouting βMy mental health my mental healthβ then they fall apart
Because they just canβt cope with the normal challenges of lifeβ
I just thought to share it will you all
The parents on my wall
Meanwhile I am insisting that Science is compulsory for my Keekee
She no get choice β¦.
That way she wonβt have any regrets when she gets to senior secondary school God willing
She will have her options open to pursue any careers related to science in University God willing ππ½
Science should be made compulsory in junior secondary school
Any hard that will help her grown and develop well is a hard she will get so she can grow up tough, think skinned and resilient through the grace, mercy and favour of God Amen ππ½
In my batch 9 parenting course I will teach you smart simple and practical ways of building your children resilience. The future is for those who are resilient and not fragile
See link in comment section to register
Ada Ujaligwa Parenting
Chineke Daalu oππ½β€οΈ
Β©AU2026
#intentionalparentingbyadaujaligwa
#adaujaligwa
#adaujaligwaparenting
#positiveparenting
#consciousparenting
#christianparenting
#godlyparenting
#chinekedaalu | 559 |
| 14 |  +618 AT LAST. WE CAN FINALLY BUY HIM A PERSONAL SMARTPHONE.
Meet the 18 year old boy who went through secondary school without owning a personal smartphone. The only one in his entire school.
When Chuchu was 12, he was convinced life would be impossible if he did not have what every other child had. He begged. He cried. He argued. He compared.
βI am the only one.β
βI am different.β
βThey are laughing at me.β
I listened. I explained. I refused.
Not because I wanted to punish him. But because I understood what an unsupervised smartphone with internet access does to children. I have seen it. Clinically. Practically. Repeatedly.
A huge proportion of childhood anxiety, behavioural problems, addiction, cyberbullying, sexual exposure, risky online behaviour and emotional dysregulation starts with one thing.
A personal smartphone too early. With freedom the child is not mature enough to handle.
So I stood my ground.
I explained my reasons even though I knew a 12 year old brain could not fully grasp them. Parenting is not about being liked. It is about being responsible.
He had access to a family phone.
He could call home.
He could research under supervision.
He could learn digital skills.
But he could not own a private digital life I could not see or protect.
At 16, he expected the phone.
I moved the age to 18 after watching the damage smartphones were doing to teenagers around us.
He was furious.
I was firm.
Today he is 18.
He waited.
He did not die.
He did not lose anything.
He gained clarity.
He watched classmates struggle with addiction, distraction, cybercrime, online bullying, mental health breakdowns and sexual exposure they were not emotionally equipped for.
And now, as an adult, he understands what I was protecting him from.
This year, he will walk into a store and choose any smartphone he wants. I will pay for it. Happily.
Because delayed gratification builds wisdom.
Because childhood does not need constant digital access to be meaningful.
Because being different for the right reasons is a life skill.
Because safety beats trend.
Chineke daalu.
I am Ada Ujaligwa Parenting
I teach parents how to raise grounded, emotionally safe and mentally strong children in a very reckless world. | 547 |
| 15 | Allow them meet the emotional needs of their child even if their are failing to meet the financial needs of the child
Allow that child be the person to decide if they want access to their other parent or not
No matter how much you love your child, your love is not enough as long as their other parent is alive and well and willing to love them to and be in their lives and they are safe with that parentβ¦. Only your love will not be enough to make that child whole, mentally stable, emotionally healthy, good self esteem and at peace with themselves
There is a reason you need 2 people to make a child β¦. A man and a womanβ¦. No child was ever born without needing a manβs $pΒ£rm and a womanβs egg. That is the same way every child need a fatherβs presence and love and a motherβs presence and love where possible
Those who lack either of them often suffer so much pain in this lifeβ¦. They often pay dearly for it in so many way. So why subject your child to that when it is avoidable β¦. If their other parent is alive and well and willing to be in their life and does not pose any risk to themβ¦.
GRANT THEM ACCESS π
TRY TO CO-PARENT PEACEFULLY WITHOUT RANCOUR AND ACRIMONY π
YOUR CHILDβS MENTAL HEALTH AND SELF ESTEEM AND EMOTIONAL STABILITY EVEN UNTIL ADULTHOOD DEPENDS ON THIS SO MUCHπ
I am so glad to see that Tontoβs child will now have peace in his life as he watches his parents treat each other with dignity and respect
Whenever a family heals, unites and peace is restored in their midst it gives me so much joy
I am Ada Ujaligwa Parenting and I love to promote great parenting values, traditions, principles and practices
In my batch 9 parenting class I teach so many skills up parents on how to get it right with their children
Go and register now
It is the best gift you can give to yourself as a parent
It will totally transform your parenting
See link to register in comment section below
Chineke Daalu oππ½β€οΈ
Β©AU2026
#intentionalparentingbyadaujaligwa
#adaujaligwa
#adaujaligwaparenting
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#chinekedaalu | 479 |
| 16 | I WAS DRAGGED SO MUCH IN JANUARY 2021 FOR ADVOCATING FOR THIS VERY THING TONTO HAS DONEβ¦. PUT YOUR CHILD BEFORE YOUR B1TTΒ£RNΒ£$$
I said it here a few weeks ago that I love the woman Tonto Dikeh has become
I was so delighted to read what Tonto posted yesterday about the reconciliation of herself and Churchill the father of her childβ¦. Not as a coupleβ¦. But as Co-parents of a child they brought into this world whom they owe access to both his parents
I was so delighted to see them unite again as co-parents to their child. I love the massive change in Tonto, I love the woman she has become. Indeed if your allow Christ to truly be in you, you are a new creature and old things have passed away and all things have become new
She has gone from a women so filled with b1ttΒ£rness and pain to a woman so filled with love and peace β¦. Her son is the greatest beneficiary of that change in her
The bitter agelong online battle between his parents β¦. Has finally come to an endβ¦. Hurrayyyyππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½ππ½
Imagine the joy in that boyβs heartβ¦. Imagine the relief in knowing your parents no longer despise each other and that they are now willing to allow you enjoy the love of both parents without any of their feeling threatened by your need to have both your partners in your life
Everybody who knows me here knows I am a passionate advocate of not depriving a child of their other parent because of a fall out between the parents
People who have followed me here for years know the battle I have fought here so many times even at the risk of many single mothers dragging here because I stood for this same thing Tonto and Churchill have doneβ¦. But I choptas not πβ¦. It is the truth that I speak and even if you donβt like it, it remains the truth π
If the other parent of your child is not a risk to their safety, set your grievances aside and GIVE THEM ACCESS TO THEIR OTHER PARENT π
When I said it years ago, I was dragged so much and accused of βSPEAKING FROM A PLACE OF PRIVILEGEβ which is what those who donβt like to hear the truth often accuse me of β¦. I am used to it. But it wonβt stop me from always speaking the uncomfortable truth
Yes your childβs other parent hurt you
Yes your childβs other parent betrayed you
Yes your childβs other parent failed you
Yes they didnβt treat you right
But they remain your childβs other parent β¦. You cannot change that. No amount of soap or detergent or bleach can wash that out. Their genes was what made it possible for you to become
You can end your relationship with your Ex without ending your childβs right to have their other parent in their lives and your Exβs rights to be in their childβs life
Separate the 3 issues β¦. Your rights, your childβs rights, your Exβd rights β¦.. Do not lump their together. They are 3 seperate entities so donβt join the 3 issues as 1.
Your child did not choose to be born. Your child did not choose any of their parents
You chose your Ex to be the other parent of your child. You owe it to them not to deprive them of that other parent you chose for them if at all possible.
Your Ex remains a very important part of your childβs life β¦.. Your childβs future mental health depends a whole lot on the quality of relationship they have with BOTH their parents
So if your Ex does not pose a risk to your child in any way shape or form, and they are willing to have access to that child, facilitate that access speedilyβ¦.
Do not allow your resentment to stand in the way of a childβs relationship with their other parent β¦. You will be doing your child a whole lot of harm by allowing your resentment for your Ex to rob them of a relationship with their other parent
Even when that other parent is not bringing shishiβ¦ Yes I know it is extremely frustrating and painfulβ¦. Yes I know that ever responsible parent should bring money for their childβs upkeep β¦.. But do not withhold access on grounds of your Ex not bringing money for child support. | 355 |
| 17 |  Matn yo'q... | 225 |
| 18 |  A man who is so busy with life that he doesnβt see caring for his child and attending to the needs of his child as his responsibility when he is at home is a man who will be abandoned by that child in his old age β¦. If he gets the bare minimum from his children in old age then he is lucky
Many men donβt realise it is when you are bathing, feeding and changing the diapers of your children that they bond with you. A bond that nothing can break in future. Later they will say their wives turned their children against them in old age. But it was him who refused to bond with his children when they were young because he allowed his f00 l1sh ego get the better of him
He saw changing his childrenβs diapers, bathing and feeding them as his wife βusing himβ
This is the reason many children will move mountains for their mothers who cared for them but wonβt lift a finger for a father who paid their school fees because they donβt have any emotional connection with a father who never put in the work in bonding with his children by being actively involved in their day to day care.
A child opens their eyes and sees their mothers doing everything for them, bathing, changing diapers, breastfeeding, minding, playing etc
Her husband will just be bringing money. Not that bringing money is small, yes it is a lot and it is most appreciated but it is not what will make your children get attached to you, it is not what will make you bond with your children. It is not what will build emotional connection with your children. It is not what will build a solid relationship with your children. Emotional connection and relationship is built through direct hands on caregiving and spending quality time with that child playing with them and doing other activities they enjoy with them.
This is what makes a child feel loved. This is what they will remember. This is what will be in their memory. It is what they remember that will make them feel close to you, not the money you brought.
So many fathers consider themselves too busy for those things that matter as much as the money they are bringing. When their wives want to involve them in the caregiving they see it as insult, they see it as their wives βusingβ them. They see it as beneath them
Binging with your child and meeting their care needs is beneath you?????
And you call yourself a parent?????
This is why many children are closer to their mothers than their fathers.
Their fathers f00 l1shly lost the opportunity to bond with his children in a bid to leave all the care giving work for his wife.
He was busy feeling too big to attend to his childrenβs day to day needs. When he is old his children will also feel too big to attend to his own care needs.
Men need to attend my batch 9 parenting course honestly
You all need your mindset about parenting totally overhauled
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Ada Ujaligwa Parenting | 455 |
| 19 |  Chuchu came home yesterday from school
He started gisting us how his day went
This is the story
Their Principal walked into their class and asked all the boys to stand up and follow her
Their Principal is a very strict no-nonsense woman. The students are afraid of her. I love that about her. If she is talking they all stand at attention. No bring any useless Gen Z behaviour around her. She does not suffer f00 l$ and takes no prisoners. If you do anyhow you see any how. I love that so much about her
So all the boys marched into her office and she told them that a girl in their school reported that one of the boys sent her a message on Instagram telling her he would gr @pΒ£ her, that she is f@t and u g ly, and reigning othet expletives on her basically cyberbvll y1ng her so viciously in her IG DMβ¦..
The girl was smart enough to screenshot it and bring it as evidence to the Principal
The Principal wanted to know which of the boys owns the IG account. It wasnβt clear who it was from the name. She said she was bringing in the Police because cyberbvllying is a crime. On top of that the bit mentioned gr @pβ¬ so that he na double gbeseeee. A clear cr1 m1 nal offence. So they are launching an investigation
Chuchu raised his hand π€πΎ immediately and told the Principal that he is not in Instagram and has never been on IG because he is not allowed by his parents to have an IG accountβ¦. The Principal asked him to leave, he was free to go because he doesnβt have an instagram account. Not having an IG account meant he was innocent.
2 other boys followed suit and told the Principal that they too donβt have an IG account. One of them said hime was in the exact same situation as Chuchu, never been on IG, parents wonβt allow it. The 2nd boy said his parents made him delete his IG account recently when they were preparing for their exams and has not activated it since. He showed proof. They were both innocent.
The Principal asked all 3 boys who were not on IG to leave as they had been excluded in the investigationβ¦. Just like that they will not be included in the investigation for not being allowed to be on social media.
The rest of the boys have an IG will be included in the investigation. Only one boy is guilty so the rest will go Scot free because they are innocent but having an IG account already made them subjects to questioning by the Police. Something that is anxiety provoking at that age.
Most of them are now 18 yrs old
So that guilty boy will be treated like an adult and will face the criminal justice system. His age will no longer protect him because he is no longer under the age of 18 yrs. Thatβs some criminal record looming ahead for him at such a young age. Just for being so f00l1sh and $tup1d and immature. He mighty not have meant it about the gr @pΒ£ but he is in hot soup nevertheless
He lacked the emotional maturity to safely be on social media and he is in hot soup because of it
When o beg parents not to rush and give their underaged children personal smartphones prematurely they think we are being too strict
The smartphone you hand to your child is a potential tool for self destruction of your child
Many children donβt have the level of self control, self restraint and emotional maturity needed to navigate a very dangerous place like social media
Either they become bvll1Β£d here or they turn around and bvlly others. They Then the exposure to predators who target children for gr001ng on various apps nko?β¦. That one is another nightmare
In my batch 9 parenting course I teach parents so many skills they need to become authoritative emotionally connected parents who will rather emotionally stable well behaved children
See link in comment section to register now
Ada Ujaligwa Parenting
Chineke Daalu oππ½β€οΈ
Β©AU2026
#intentionalparentingbyadaujaligwa
#adaujaligwa
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#positiveparenting
#consciousparenting
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#chinekedaalu | 471 |
| 20 |  I HAVE A CONFESSION TO MAKE
But let me give you small background story so you understand
My husband and I created a savings bank account for each of our children (from when they are toddlers) and every month we paid money into it
We set up a standing order for each of our children to go into their account
Not a lot of money, just small steady consistent money going into their account monthly from early childhood to adulthood
When they go into University, another seperate account is created for them for their monthly pocket money and accomodation fees and other expenses β¦. 20% of the monthly pocket money we give them is deducted and send also by standing order from that their 2nd account to that 1st savings account we created for them as toddlers
So 2 saving schemes occurring at the same time
One from us (the 1st one we set up when they were toddlers)
One from themselves ( we set it up when they enter University so they learn to save from pocket money we give them)
That way they also learn to save by themselves
We as parents retain full control of that 1st savings account where all their savings go into
When they graduate β¦. We then give them full control of that 1st savings account. By then a substantial amount of money that will help them start life is already waiting for them. From there they can pay their first rent or other bills before their start earning a steady income, they wonβt go into personal financial crises. They can also start investing with that money they saved.
Now back to my confession
That initial standing order we started for them in early childhood is still running for my son Doc πππππ
We have been unable to stop that monthly standing order for him πππππ
He has asked us to stop so many times because he no longer needs it
But the responsible parents in us is not allowing us stop
This young man pays his own bills π― %, lives in a different city from us, bought his own car and is living and running his own life totally independently yet we are still allowing the standing order payment we set up for him in his early childhood to still be entering his account monthly
This young man is now a medical doctor who gives us pocket money monthly yet we still allowed that monthly savings to go into his savings account monthly
Which kain thing be this πππππ
We can stop it with the press of a button but we still feel responsible for him on some level and years of providing for him has made us addicted to providing for him
This is so weird but we are unable to bring ourselves to stop that money from going into his account monthly
Is it only us that feel this way towards our children?
I never thought it was possible to feel this way
But once a responsible parent, always a responsible parent
The need to provide for your children will never leave you entirely
It is part of being a responsible parent who is raising responsible children who well emulate how you are parenting them in caring for you in your old age and in caring for their own children in return
Register for batch 9 parenting now so you learn skills that will transform your parenting
See link to register ππ½
Chineke Daalu oππ½β€οΈ
Β©AU2025
#intentionalparentingbyadaujaligwa
#adaujaligwa
#adaujaligwaparenting
#positiveparenting
#consciousparenting
#christianparenting
#godlyparenting
#chinekedaalu | 409 |
