•Havkale ﷽

8️⃣THERE IS ABUSE, ADDICTION, OR ADULTERY All these are haran but sadly found in some home today that happens to lack the fear of Allah. Abuse, addiction, and adultery could be signs of an unhappy marriage 💖The 3 As (abuse, addiction, and adultery) can be a deal-breaker for most couples that leads to divorce. Undoubtedly, it is hard to overlook, forgive or tolerate these problems that can break down a once-happy marriage. 💞Alcoholism or gambling addiction can cause harm to a relationship due to the prolonged feelings of shame, insecurity and stress felt by the spouse whose partner is addicted to such vices. 🧡Domestic violence, if silently tolerated by the victim over a period of time often leads to the aggressor escalating the level of violence to obtain more satisfaction of being in control of the unhealthy relationship. 💔Discovering infidelity in a spouse often causes one to harbour hurt and negative feelings internally. Such unhealed wounds can re-appear in future even after one decides to “forgive and forget” the unfaithful partner. 🩶Feelings of insecurity are a major relationship killer, and if you are constantly feeling scared, anxious, or depressed because of your partner’s actions, these are signs that your marriage is in serious trouble. There are many external circumstances that could be putting further stress on your marital relationship such as caring for young children, looking after a sick parent, or losing a job due to retrenchment. Seeking help from a marriage therapist should be the first port of call if you notice any of the warning signs above. If your partner is not interested or committed to tackling the issues of your marriage together with you and you find yourself realising that you have exhausted all possible ways to resolve your marital issues, choosing to go your separate ways is an option to consider. Recognising that your marriage cannot be saved is both difficult and painful.

7️⃣THERE’S CRITICISM, CONTEMPT, DEFENSIVENESS, AND STONEWALLING 💔Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling could be signs of an unhappy marriage 🛑Criticism: Attacking and shifting all the blame on your partner by targeting their appearance, personality and character. For example, “You are so stupid, you can’t do anything right.” or “You only care about yourself you are so selfish” and “You are so old and ugly”. 🛑Contempt: Disrespecting and disregarding your partner’s feelings and using your ego to rule the relationship. You start to become sarcastic and enforce your superiority on your partner by attacking their self-worth. 🛑Defensiveness: Refusing to accept responsibility in a problem and attacking your partner in retaliation. You constantly find excuses to minimize the consequences of your actions. E.g. “It’s all your fault” or “I am always the one doing the work”. 🛑Stonewalling: Emotionally shutting down instead of openly addressing issues. 💔Continuing to exhibit these 4 traits often erode a relationship to the point where there is no longer mutual respect for each other. 💖To prevent the marriage from getting to the point of no return, self-reflection and recognising one’s faults may very well be the key to mending the relationship.

💔 8 SIGNS OF AN UNHAPPY MARRIAGE THAT COULD LEAD TO DIVORCE 💔 Continuation 4️⃣EVERYTHING THEY DO IRRITATES YOU ❤️What was once cute and endearing has now turned into frustration and disgust, where even the smallest things can explode into huge arguments. 💕The little things such as the way they eat or talk might start to become more than just an annoyance, and you might start to feel a sense of resentment towards your partner. 💙When this happens, you might want to analyse why you feel this way and figure out how to resolve these unhealthy thoughts in your marriage. 5️⃣THERE IS EMOTIONAL WITHDRAWAL 💞Emotional withdrawal is a huge sign that there you might be subconsciously thinking about a future – one that does not include your partner. ❤️Often, emotional withdrawal happens in an effort to convince yourself that you don’t care anymore so that it is easier when the actual separation occurs. ❣️You might notice you or your partner pulling back from the relationship and feeling distant from them despite being in the same room. 🧡No one feels heard, and no one listens – and it can be extremely stressful to be in an unhappy marriage that is on the brink of becoming toxic. 💓It is never a good idea to let the cold war prolong indefinitely. You may want to nip the problem in the bud and get marriage therapy to mend your relationship before it is too late. 6️⃣BOTH OF YOU HAVE DIFFERING VALUES, BELIEFS, AND GOALS 💔Differing values, beliefs, and goals could be a sign of an unhappy marriage 💓 “Opposites attract” may be what makes a couple want to tie the knot. Unfortunately, different values, backgrounds and lifestyles can quickly become major roadblocks in growing together as a couple. 💗It would be near impossible to find parties in a marriage to have similar values, hobbies, interests, beliefs and family backgrounds. 🩶However, studies have shown that couples with similar values, cultural background and lifestyle habits find it easier to understand and live with each another as compared to those who are vastly different. 🩵Completely different parenting styles or different ways of spending one’s money may often be the root of many heated quarrels in a relationship. 💝One would probably find it easier to pick up a new hobby or kick a habit than to adopt a partner’s set of beliefs and attitudes towards life. ❤‍🔥Seeking marriage therapy earlier could help you find new ways to resolve such differences amicably.

❤️8 SIGNS OF AN UNHAPPY MARRIAGE THAT COULD LEAD TO DIVORCE ❤️ 💔Being in a relationship comes with plenty of ups and downs, and over the years, many couples tend to find themselves falling through the cracks – forgetting the very promise that they first took on their wedding day. 💔Most of the time, people do not just simply fall out of love. Instead, problems often build up slowly over time – testing the basic foundations of a relationship. 💔Facts of “unreasonable behaviour”, “infidelity and extramarital affairs”, and “financial problems” are some of the common reasons used by people for filing of their divorce. 💔According to the 2016 Prudential Relationship Index that surveyed more than 5,000 adults aged 25 to 55 in Asia – 24% of married people in Singapore actually thought seriously about leaving their spouse. 💔Given that being in an unhappy marriage can take a huge toll on our physical and emotional well-being – knowing the signs of a troubled marriage can help you decide if the red flags need to be addressed.

فتاة تُلقن مراسل قناة كندية درساً قاسياً وتقول له : حماس ليست إرهابية , حماس هي التي تُدافع عن شعبها الفلسطيني في غزة 🇵🇸

🇵🇸♥️🖤🤍💚🇵🇸❤️🖤🤍💚🇵🇸 🤲🏻 Whether your children ask you or not, you must tell them that we love Palestine because 01: Palestine has been the land of the Prophets, peace be upon them all. 02: Prophet Ibrahim (peace be upon him) first migrated to Palestine. 03: Allah Ta'ala saved Prophet Lut (peace be upon him) from the punishment that had befallen his people in Palestine. 04: Prophet Dawood (peace be upon him) lived in this land and built a masjid here. 05: Prophet Sulaiman (peace be upon him) used to sit in this country and rule over the whole world. 06: The famous story of the ant and Sulaiman in the Quran, in which an ant said to the rest of his ants, "O ants, get into your burrows and hide" happened right here in a valley in the city of Ashkelon in this country, which was later named "Wadi al-Naml" – Valley of the Ants”. 07: The mihrab/prayer place of Prophet Zakariyya (peace be upon him) is also in this city of Jerusalem. 08: Prophet Musa (peace be upon him) told his companions about this country and to enter this holy city. He called this city holy because of its being free from shirk and being the land of Prophets. 09: Many miracles took place in this city, including the blessed birth of Jesus from the blessed and pure virgin Sayyidina Maryam. 10: When his people wanted to kill Prophet Isa (peace be upon him), Allah Ta'ala took him up to the heavens from Jerusalem. 11: After giving birth, when a woman is at the extreme of her physical weakness, Sayyidina Maryam's shaking of the palm trunk to get dates in such a state is also a divine miracle. 12: One of the signs of the Day of Judgement will be the return of Isa to the earth in this city. 13: Prophet Jesus (peace be upon him) will kill the Dajjal at Bab Lud in this land. 14: Palestine is the land where everyone will be raised, resurrected and judged. 15: It is from this city that Gog and Magog will start fighting and rioting across the earth. 16: One of the Quranic stories that happened in this city is the story of Talut and Goliath and Talut's triumph over Goliath. 17: Palestine also has the honour of being the first Qibla of Muslims after the five prayers became obligatory. After the Hijra, Sayyidina Jibreel (peace be upon him) directed our Prophet (peace be upon him) to turn his face from Masjid al-Aqsa (Jerusalem) to the Kaaba (Makkah) during prayer. The mosque in which this incident took place is still called the Qiblatin Mosque. 18: The Holy Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) was brought here from Makkah to Bayt al-Maqdis (Jerusalem) before he was taken to heavens on the night of Ascension. 19: All the Prophets prayed here behind our Prophet (peace be upon him). Thus, Palestine once again became the land of all the Prophets. 20: Sayyidina Abu Dharr says that I asked the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, which was the first mosque built on earth? So he said: Masjid al-Haram (i.e. the Kaaba). I asked which one? (When the mosque was built) he said: Al-Aqsa Mosque (i.e. Bait al-Maqdis). I then asked how much time was there between the two of them? The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "Forty years, and whenever you can, you should pray there" 21: After the departure of the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, Sayyidina Abu Bakr dealt with the wars of apostasy and false prophets. Despite the dire need of military resources and manpower to deal with these many battlefronts, it is also an unforgettable fact that the army prepared by the Prophet was still sent by Abubakr to liberate the land of Palestine. 22: In the golden era of Islam, Sayyidina Umar as Khalifah, leaving aside all the other numerous Muslim conquests around the world, solely for the liberation of Palestine, himself went from Madinah and prayed there, highlighting the importance and greatness of this city. 23: The re-conquest of this city by Salahudidn Ayyubi on Friday 27th Rajab 583 Hijri on the night of Mi'raj is also a sign of Allah.

24: The name of Jerusalem is also Bait al-Maqdis and Al Quds due to the sanctity and holiness of this city which distinguishes it from all other cities. More than 5000 Companions of the Prophet sacrificed their lives to acquire this city and save it from the oppression and tyranny of the Christian Romans. And that chapter of martyrdom is not closed until this day. This city of Jerusalem is thus also known as the city of martyrs. Please share and pray for Palestine. #Free_PALESTINE #Reminder @Havkale

BASIC RED FLAGS WHEN SEEKING A HUSBAND 1. He has no solid plan for the future (his and yours) 2. He is controlling. 3. He lies. 4. He has no mind of his own. 5. He is always complaining and rarely positive. 6. He is abusive, rude and lashes out without control. 7. He does not have a properly defined one on one relationship with God. 8. He does not have good family ties. 9. He has no defined legitimate occupation or source of income. 10. Alcohol and substance are a major part of his life. 11. He always has to have the final say. 12. He treats 'lower' people poor. 13. He has too many women actively involved in his life with a past that's still not clear. 14. He has a different/No better definition and expectation from marriage. 15. He has too little/no time for you. 16. He wants you to get pregnant before he marries you. 17. He is always about sex or money. 18. He is in a rush. 19. He is financially reckless (even if it is when he spends for you). 20. His personality and demeanor drives fear through you. #Advice #MuslimMarriageTips @Havkale

Falling in Love is a DISEASE ⛓ and it's cure is to MARRY one YOU LOVE ❤️ ~Imam Ibn al Qayyim jawziyyah رحمة الله [Source] [ tibb al nawabi pg.250 #Advice @Havkale