Ashangulit💜🌻

My Childhood Crush on Will Smith I think my first mistake was watching Will Smith as a child and assuming that, when I grew up, I would somehow have a chance. I was fifteen, with absolutely no business having such strong opinions about a grown man. 😭 There he was, smiling on my screen, being effortlessly funny, looking good without even trying, and there I was, a literal child, convinced that this was the finest man God had ever allowed on television. And the confidence I had? INSANE. I wasn't thinking about homework, my future, or the fact that this man was old enough to be somebody's father. No. I was busy wondering why I couldn't find a boy at school who looked, talked, or smiled like Will Smith. Every movie was another piece of evidence. Every interview was another reason to believe that no other man could possibly compete. That smile? Unfair. That laugh? Criminal. That charm? Somebody needed to investigate. The funniest part is that Will Smith was out there living his actual adult life, completely unaware that somewhere in the world, a fifteen year old girl had made him the standard against which every boy her age would be judged. Poor boys. They never stood a chance. And now, looking back, I can only laugh at the sheer innocence of it all. I wasn't looking for a boyfriend. I was looking for a Will Smith replica, and I genuinely thought that was a reasonable expectation. Fifteen year old me, wherever you are, I understand. You had taste. Questionable expectations, perhaps, but taste. Ps. I STILL LIKE HIM😂😭

Bekagn

Artificial intelligence :robots with human like mind Machine Learning: sounds like a course eu take in robotics class Commit: I couldn’t even guess Push:promoting ur product Pull:attracting customers Brute force:sounds like a billionaires name Debugging:this sounds familiar..i think removing problems in ur codes Compiler: an app that compiles ur files in ine place Server:a big box beyeseferu yale that our information and net and what ever is stored in. That kebero thingy telle has Inheritance:nigga what does this even have to do with tech beyesusm😭. Let me guess it is a code you take from someone else and use it as ur own. Rubber ducking:ur just creating stuff .but sounds like a fake button they put in websites that is pointless.but u just put it there cause u don’t wanna loose an idea. Garbage collection:delete in group Zombie process:slow process

Orphan Red black tree Now ur just creating words mood ltyzubgn 😭.

Codex: secret government project. v0: just another perfume i can not afford.I would never even guess it was tech😭 or if i did i would assume it is like those windows,apple mnamn endemibalew neger. Claude: im pretty sure that is a storage. Fine-tuning: an app for guitarists.pretty sure i heard @thewallofkaleb say this word. Killing a child:😭😭 the backspace key . Or a virus

Let’s start from the first word i just saw.. Sub stack: a file of all ur work u want to show someone that wants to hire you stacked up animated like a building with each floor with one work.

Tell me tech words and i will choose a few and tell you what i imagine they are from a non tech girly who has zero idea.

Go ask a man if he would ever date a girl who makes more money than him and if he says no ask why. If his answer is she will take advantage of me..girl run

How does one talk about re waiting until marriage ?(after already doing stuff with that same human) (and u don’t have the same conviction)

Mourning Our Never There is a particular kind of grief reserved for things that never happened. A grief with no photographs, no anniversaries, no last words to replay at three in the morning. Nothing was ever buried, yet something inside you still knows how to mourn. I call it mourning our never. I mourn the mornings that never knew our names, the places we never walked together, the ordinary Tuesdays we never got to grow old in. I mourn the version of myself that existed only beside you in my imagination, and the thousand tomorrows I gave us without realizing tomorrow had never made us a promise. How strange it is to miss things you have never touched. To feel homesick for a place you have never been. To carry a heart full of goodbyes when there was never a proper hello. Perhaps that is what makes our never so difficult to bury. There is no reality to soften the dream, no memories to remind me that maybe things would have been different. We remain untouched by time, forever beautiful in the terrible perfection of what could have been. Sometimes, I wonder if somewhere, in another life, we made it. If there is a version of us living the days I keep mourning, laughing over something stupid, growing older in a home full of familiar sounds, unaware that in another world, we never happened. But here, we are a sentence left unfinished. And I am learning that not every story is meant to be lived. Some exist only to teach us how deeply we can feel, how fiercely we can hope, and how to let go of something we never truly had. Still, let me mourn a little longer. For the almost, the maybe, the someday that quietly became never. Because even though nothing happened, I was there. I felt it. I hoped. And sometimes, the heart must grieve not only what it has lost, but everything it will never know.

Time to be vulnerable 😊

😂😂😂

I just got in to insta and the first thing i saw was my old friend who got engaged. She had this huge engagement surprise party, with a huge rock. Now i just feel like my plan to marry after 4/5 years feels slow. And when most my frnds are having their second ir first baby i am just gonna get engaged. Plus it might not even happen five years later with my hate for men these days😂😭. Damn

Dear friends,if you turn in to vampires pls make sure u eat me first.

The love Jesus is teaching me. Jesus is teaching me that love is more than a feeling. It is a choice, a posture of the heart, and a reflection of who He is shaping me to become. He is teaching me forgiveness not the kind that pretends I was never hurt, but the kind that refuses to let hurt turn my heart into something bitter. He is teaching me that I can forgive someone and still acknowledge what they did, that I can let go without pretending it didn’t matter, and that choosing peace is not the same as saying what happened was okay. He is teaching me hope, too. The kind that remains when prayers seem unanswered, when life doesn’t unfold the way I imagined, and when I cannot understand what God is doing. I am learning that hope is not always the confidence that everything will happen the way I want. Sometimes, it is simply trusting that God is still good, even when I don’t have the answers. And then there is purity. Not just purity in my actions, but in my thoughts, my intentions, and the quiet places of my heart. He is teaching me to love without manipulation, to give without keeping score, to speak without intending to wound, and to do good even when no one will ever know. To become someone whose heart is not ruled by envy, pride, resentment, or the need to be chosen. I am learning that loving like Jesus does not mean being perfect. It means being willing to be changed. It means returning to Him when I fall short, allowing Him to soften the parts of me that have grown hard, and trusting Him with the parts I still don’t know how to heal. Perhaps that is what makes this journey so beautiful I am not only learning how to love other people; I am learning how to become a person who loves differently. And my prayer is that, little by little, my heart will become more like His full of forgiveness without bitterness, hope without fear, and purity without pride. That when people encounter me, they might see a small reflection of the love that first found me, forgave me, and never stopped calling me closer to Him.

The love that thought me

I used to think love meant staying. Staying through the misunderstandings, the broken promises, the nights I cried, and the mornings I convinced myself things would be different. I thought loving someone meant understanding them even when they didn’t understand me, forgiving them even when the same things kept hurting, and holding on because what we had was too beautiful to give up on. I loved with hope. I saw the good in someone and held on to it, even when the reality of loving them became painful. I learned how to miss someone while still being with them, how to feel lonely in a relationship, and how to make excuses for the people I never wanted to lose. And when I finally let go, it wasn’t because the love disappeared overnight. It was because I started realizing that love alone couldn’t fix everything. I could understand someone’s struggles without making them my responsibility. I could forgive someone without giving them another chance to hurt me. I could miss them without needing to return. That kind of love changed me. It made me question myself, my worth, and the way I loved. But it also taught me that having a good heart doesn’t mean accepting everything that comes with it. I still think about the person I was when I loved that deeply. I hope she knows she wasn’t stupid for believing in someone. She wasn’t weak for staying, and she wasn’t cruel for leaving. She was just a girl trying to make something beautiful work with all the love she had. And I hope she knows that one day, she would understand that some endings aren’t proof that we failed at love. Sometimes, they’re the beginning of learning how to love ourselves, too.

Ok fine i will do all of this besmabbbb. Gn u gotta wait. I hate typing and forcing not to have misspelled words😭

Lool not y’all being angry😂😂

I can’t just end it like this so since my fav topic is Love.. ama start my own series about it. For a few days. Will see how that goes. I will write about * Romantic love * friendship love * family love * christ’s love * what love thought me * what I view love as * if Love was a place (already started) and will add more through time….