bullshitting to all

if i ever get a gut wrenching stab, the only things that's gonna flow is my love for the ones i have begged for to stay in my life.

this and no romantic life

it sounds very fictional but i believe that, our brain can see beyond our eyes, hear without our ears, smell what our nose can't and feel further than what our body ever could. it just fools our conscious somehow to believe we're limited. but why would our own organ work against our system?

Have you ever looked at someone and felt something that isn’t envy and isn’t admiration either— just this quiet, impossible fascination. Not because you want their life. Not because you think yours is lacking. But because their existence feels so complete from the outside. And you don’t want to enter it. You almost don’t want to know. Because the second you stand where they stand, the whole illusion breaks. You don’t want their perspective— you want to keep the distance that lets it stay infinite. You watch them talk and think— wow. That person wakes up every morning inside that exact mind. They have inside jokes nobody else hears. A favorite spoon probably. A random fear. Songs attached to people you’ll never know. Memories they forgot to remember. And somehow they carry all that and still answer messages with “ok.” And you keep choosing their name in conversations. Not because you’re obsessed. But because your brain decided they became symbolic. Like they accidentally started representing something larger than themselves— proof that people contain entire climates. You realize they’re not extraordinary. That’s the worst part. They’re ordinary. And somehow that makes it more overwhelming. Because if one random person can contain that much unknowable life— then everyone does. Every person walking home. Every person buying bread. Every person staring out of a bus window. Entire private universes moving past each other pretending to discuss weather. And sometimes you almost feel sad— not because you can’t become them— but because you’ll never witness the full movie. You’ll only ever get trailers. A sentence. A laugh. A repeated phrase. The way they stand. The stories they choose. You become attached to fragments. Not because fragments are enough— but because fragments are all existence ever gives. And maybe that’s why some people stay in your mind for years without doing anything dramatic. Because your brain looked at them once and went— wow. Not I want to be them. Not I want them. Just— I’m glad consciousness happened there too. Sorry. I dont have yapping partner sadly

i don't wanna go to the gym. do you know why i don't wanna go to gym? because it would ruin my perfection!

for the record, the doctors here mean the psychologist and therapists. don't come to me bashing about body practioners.

"you don't like talking to the doctors, why's that? - they always wanna be the smartest person in the room, don't they? well, in fact, that's me."

you guys are so weird, why would you vote to sleep. smh

am i the only asshole who despite being self aware keeps improving myself and not act self jeopardizive towards them?

ruskin bond said a lotta thing, but one thing he said which i loved the most was, "I believe that mountains do affect one's personality, if one can remain among them long enough. Once you have lived with mountains for any length of time you belong to them, and must return again and again."

ruskin bond said a lotta thing, but one thing he said which i loved the most was, "I believe that mountains do affect one's personality, if one can remain among them long enough. Once you have lived with mountains for any length of time you belong to them, and must return again and again."

the watchfulness of a struggling climber vexed me beyond endurance and an inexpressible adoration for mountains was born in me. although i don't exactly know why it happened maybe one day i will?