tiny canvas

balls deep into work today. been eating shit for most of the past 2 weeks, and yesterday on a whim, built something i actually can see something with. distant gut feel but i can relate it to the product i have been wanting for decades. in its origin it won't be close to it, but if it can get to its ~final form, this is it.

I had a phase last year when I yearned for close (share everything homie-like) friends like back in college days, near my neighborhood. but I stopped. and I don't think I will ever resume. here's why: - chatting about day to day mundane topics with people I don't have existing bond with for hours gets very old very quickly - I'm married now, so no biological instinct to go out much - my real brother is my best friend, and I have 2 very close childhood friends, plus occasional peers (work-related) who are actually helpful in stimulating my thinking unless who I sit with can bring me another dimension of joy, or help me make money/collaborate on work front, almost all of them can remain friendly acquaintances. now I'm reaching the arc where all I care about boils down to: - dream - family - love everything else to me is noise

I wish I was but I am not a hustler who can sell what doesn't make him "feel." I wish I was, but I ain't. Building something and getting it out the door is the easy part. Pushing it through ups and downs is the hard part. I know that trait of mine is what has thwarted so many of the products i've touched. I tried to fix it, but a part of me doesn't wanna fix it. I want to find what makes me feel first. Today for the first time in a while, I felt a glimpse of something again. Time to brush off that dust and run again.

cant seem to focus for enough block of hours a day to make meaningful progress so woke up at 5 to workout and now starting the day. i really need to disappear into woods with zero contact to this world to move something. i find myself getting irritated at my pace at increasing rate recently

just got married! time to get back in the zone. submitted one update for the app, prototyped a couple more features, and working on my content game. https://apps.apple.com/us/app/rich-people-habit-tracker/id6756950438

having shit sleep can really make a difference in my mindset. ceteris paribus, yesterday i felt like i could do anything i set my mind to, and today with poor sleep (only 2 hours), my mind feels plagued with negative thoughts. won't let it spiral me down though. gotta do the damn work independent of how i "feel."

can’t fall asleep today for some reason. can’t find enough time in the day for uninterrupted work and it’s driving me crazy.

finally launched the ios app. took way longer than i thought, but loving myself for keeping my own promise. just at the starting line, but i am in the race now. 🫡 if anyone reading wants to try stealing habits of rich people like bill gates, ronaldo, to unlock your full potential, please try and give me good review if you like it 🫡 https://apps.apple.com/us/app/rich-people-habit-tracker/id6756950438

what I ended up shipping to App Store was less than 10% of what I actually designed and built as an app. how it evolved over the past 8 weeks: 1. net worth ranking app of rich people 2. rich people quotes 3. rich people bio 4. rich people bio + twitter like layout 5. rich people story based journaling app 6. rich people quotes as imsg/AI chat + share card *felt stuck and the app got bloated, and I started getting burnt out* A. built a simple tamagotchi habit tracker app for myself B. started using it more than the original Rich People app C. decided to ship it as Rich Habits first and pause the original D. remixed Rich People app's sauce to the new app then shipped it. move fast and break things, and I did move fast but only internally. time to map it to external fire now once it gets approved from App Store.

this new logo started as a 3s napkin sketch, then polished on nano banana pro. gpt isn’t as good at these so picked gemini instead. building at the speed of thoughts.

used: - figma (design) - cursor + claude (code) - revenuecat (in app purchase) - gemini (thought partner) pretty simple stack. built it solo end to end.

first app in years that i built for myself, to build a better version of myself. hope tim cook approves it fast so that i can get things rolling before my wedding.

finally submitted the new app. took a lot longer than i thought

really busy recently, and how i prioritize my time has been helping me realize what i value in my life: wedding prep -almost there! rich habits app - 99.9% there for app submission. skipping testflight. fuck it ship it! family time - holiday trip to dallas, just got back to la dream. family (including close friends) love. these three cannot be compromised. must protect and nurture at all costs. they are why and how i feel alive. when even one of them shakes, my soul aches. all else is fleeting joy. momentary bonds all converge and diverge. once the wedding is complete, i must give all of my undivided attention to evolve my tinkering beyond that little research in my head, into a real business. i believe in myself. i can get it done. i am curious to meet the true version of myself. the fullest totality of who i am. that is why i live. to prove and become who i am supposed to be in my head. i owe it to myself and those who love me the way i love them.

i need my quest to be deeply happy, not just “pizza so yum” “movie so good” - they are fleeting happiness. need something that can fill my soul

nothing day to day and worldly - holidays, food, clothes, cars, homes, none of it touches my soul these days. i know i should not feel like this, but i feel that i am in a hurry. and all the worldly things like christmas gatherings are losing their meanings to me. i just wanna get my business going again, build upon my dreams, reach my full potentials, and provide for my family in long run. prove to myself that i can indeed do anything i set my mind to. nothing else matters. i feel the holiday blues. i feel distracted.

as soon as i wake up, i am possessed by this newfound insight. being the 100% version of myself is the prerequisite to increase the surface area for luck to land on my field. 5:30am workout, meditation, it feels good to be ready when others are just waking up.

imagine if computing devices didn’t have solid operating system. imagine the chaos. we humans are computing entity. and most people including myself lack solid operating system to tilt our fate to rich lives - rich body, mind, relationships, and bank account. 👉 borrow the operating system of people who already won. following their words and random updates is not enough. talk is cheap. action produces the clues to the next chapter. follow their actions. routine. system.

man it is just not easy

“enough. for i’ve made my decision, i am now free.” it clicked so hard with me while reading my favorite webtoon. no regrets. i’m gonna keep going. i have many days where i wonder off with what ifs. what if i just went and worked at a big company. what if i did something different. what if and what if. enough. i’ve made my decision. gonna make a raw concept off my mind and make it a reality with my own two hands. with that resolve again, i feel free. i am free.