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somewhere between brainrot and peak wisdom i post a lot about my current obsessions (which change way too often (lowkey a photo dump as well)
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i believe it's because they hope that things are going to change for the better someday (which i find ridiculous)
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it scares me that i can go days speaking barely 10 words, even when i'm surrounded by people.
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when you lose an emotional attachment to someone, you realize how ordinary they are. it's your love and your energy that makes people seem so special.
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how am i ever going to repay my mother? i know it's not supposed to be seen as a transaction but i really haven’t ever done anything in return for everything she has done and sacrificed for me and i don’t think i ever will because all i can ever be is a huge disappointment. what use even is the love i have for her if she just has to suffer all the time? i wish i came into her life as a gentle wave rather than a storm. i think in the process of the whole growing up thing i killed the both of us.
