Self-expert|Author's blog

Mismatch between words and deeds In this type of manipulation, the discussion of the topic is replaced by a discussion of the opponent. In this case, you have to show that the arguments of the interlocutor do not correspond to his own behavior, manifestations of character, principles of life and position. For example: - You're arguing about modern fashion, and you walk in stomped, dirty shoes made in China! Don't make me laugh!

Don't refuse a request Any request implies gratitude. However, manipulators tend to make empty promises or forget about favors. Fulfill the request, but don't be shy about asking for a favor in return. Better yet, let the manipulator know in advance so you don't have the option of avoiding a reciprocal action.

The "Missed Profit" technique Impose on the object of manipulation the idea that if he does not do what you recommend, in the future he will miss a huge benefit and will regret terribly. For example, "This cryptocurrency is on the rise right now. If you don't buy it, you have a lot to lose." There can be many variations, the main thing is to paint a beautiful picture of benefits and a sad picture of possible losses in front of the victim.

The "Matching Opinions" technique Express a point of view that is shared by your listeners. The closer your points of view are to each other, the easier it will be for you to get their approval of your ideas. Using this technique throughout the entire persuasion process will help you encourage your opponents to make the decision you want. People tend to sympathize with those who share their opinions. This means you can gain the trust of your victims and get them to follow what is beneficial to you.

Jump from topic to topic After giving important information, hastily jump to another topic, depriving the victim of the opportunity to challenge it. Censorship of the psyche of the object of manipulation will not have time to pass everything through itself, and the probability that some of the information will penetrate into the subconscious, and from there will affect his consciousness in a favorable way for you increases.

Please those who are stronger than you Make your bosses seem more brilliant than they are, and you will reach the pinnacle of power. In cases where you need to get under a stronger and more powerful person, you can get very close to him or her with this trick. After all, strong people let those weaker than them get close to them. In manipulation, it is important to appear weaker than you really are, so that the opponent, the enemy, the competitor, does not know your true capabilities and does not evaluate them adequately. Obedience is what strong people will value above all in you. Your task is to skillfully use their ignorance and achieve your goals.

Mirror your interlocutor's body language If you want to make a person like you and make him trust you, mirror his body language, especially his postures and gestures. Most importantly, move smoothly. For example, when my interlocutor crosses his arms, I wait another 30-60 seconds before repeating after him. I can tell you with certainty that this trick is indispensable when you need to win over a victim and gain their trust.

False Shame Use a false argument against your opponent, which he is able to "swallow" without much objection. Appeals such as "Surely you know that the decision was made to..." or "Surely you have read about..." put your opponent in a state of false shame; he becomes embarrassed to say publicly that he does not know the things you are talking about. In most cases, the victim will either nod or pretend to remember what you are talking about, thereby acknowledging your sometimes false arguments.

The "False Dilemma" technique Often it is necessary to ask someone for a favor, but that favor does not interest the person, and his desire to help "goes away. To get the victim to do something for you, put him in front of a false choice. Say you need someone to feed your cat for a couple of days while you're out of town. Instead of asking if they can help you, I suggest saying something like, "Would you be more comfortable feeding Murzik in the morning or in the evening?" That way you will limit the victim's ability to refuse you, and she will agree.

Offer the object of manipulation something that is not difficult for him to do Instead of making a big request right away, try starting small. If the person has helped you with something minor, he will be more willing to do something more important. But so that the victim will not suspect anything, do not immediately increase your desires. In applying this technique, I have found that it is more effective to wait a couple of days, and only then make a larger request.