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اگزیستانسیال

اگزیستانسیال

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هرکس بدون حضور دیگر / t.me/loyrex

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نمیدونم، راجبش پنجره رو باز میکنم تا هوا یکم عوض شه. شاید هم پریدم. بازم میگم نمیدونم.

حقیقتش وضعیتم انقدر خرابه که نه‌تنها حاضرم مدرسه‌ایی باشم، بلکه حاضرم زنگ اول ریاضی داشته باشم.

میبینی عزیزم؟ نیازی نیست حتما مدرسه‌ایی باشی تا ساعت ۷ صبح بیدار شی و بزنه به سرت. میتونی تا ۷ صبح بیدار بمونی و به صورت بزرگسالانه بزنه به سرت.

well it made me think of that if anybody will miss me or not since i talk to 4 ppl and 2 of them are me.

not suicidal shit but i really hope to turn into someone's Dearly Missed as soon as possible.

you can breathe, see, smell, listen, taste, touch or whatever you think of, and still be dead.

the blood in your veins don't need to stop running to make sure you’re dead.

you don't need to stop breathing to feel dead.

"Dearly missed" while he's still alive, breathing like a stray dog skipping the last moments of his life in the corner of the road he got hit.

you're dearly missed, even tho that you're dead, and even tho that you're still breathing.

the wraith of my former mistakes, barbed wire around my neck. one deep breath, he’s gone.

something in the gloom awakens, i can hear ghostly voice. haunting melody, heartbeat of woes. this place is the abyss of my indecision and now i'm ready to roll the dice 🎲.

2:08 echo in the bones can’t avoid the noise.

i'm moving through the maze and i can't get control. it's some kind of vicious game and i'm just a part of the show. maybe this one dream among many that i will forget, but the walls keep closing in. time goes awry.

get better or get worse. the sense of what is right, it's somehow slowly getting lost. like a moth i fly to the light but keep hitting the wall. stone walls grow all around me to the sky. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ i hit the walls but they don't fall to pieces. i'm climbing up but they're too high and i fall. i break myself, i'm drowning in the darkness. maybe my eyes cannot discern the guiding light.

i hate the fact that i lost ALL control of my brain when i'm listening to a song that i wasn't supposed to.

the sudden urge to get shot in the forehead at 6 am is driving me insane.