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اگزیستانسیال

اگزیستانسیال

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هرکس بدون حضور دیگری / t.me/loyrex

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stars and air find themselves here at night, cold and dark as everything, deep and wet and secret, heretofore to no end, ether.

god or whatever abandoned me so hard that i can't even get drunk properly.

i feel like a divorced dad who went to buy some milk and never came back.

they said death will ring your doorbell when it's time, but don't you think it's getting too late honey? papa is getting worried.

i know it passed, but it still haunts me.

it makes me realize i didn't change a bit. i mean i did change indeed but, at what cost.

just by thinking that i couldn't do anything about it at that time and realizing that i still can't, makes me feel sick.

thinking about an event in the past that you could do something about feels like scratching your wound open to make it bleed again.

3:37 i know someday you'll have a beautiful life, i know you'll be a star in somebody else's sky, but why? why can't it be mine?

all the love gone bad, turned my world to black, tattooed all i see, all that i am, all that i'll be.

all the twisted thoughts that spin around my head, i'm spinnin, how quick the Sun can drop away.

i take a walk outside, i'm surrounded by some kids at play. i can feel their laughter, so why do i see her?

and now my bitter hands chafe beneath the clouds of what was everything. all the pictures have all been washed in black, tattooed everything.

all i taught her was everything, i know she gave me all that she wore.

sheets of empty canvas, untouched sheets of clay, were laid spread out before me, as her body once did. all five horizons revolved around her soul, as the Earth to the Sun, now the air i tasted and breathed has taken a turn.