Based Zone

A son and a father Sam is a young adult. He and his father have a conflicted relationship. He feels that his father loves him, but his father never tells him. So he convinces himself that his father doesn't love him that much. Henry is Sam's father. He has a conflicted relationship with his son. He loves his son but doesn't really know how to tell him. He convinces himself that his son thinks he is a bad father. "Why hasn't my dad ever said 'I love you' to me?" Sam can't figure it out. "You have to be tough on your son if you want him to succeed." This was Henry's father's advice Henry was successful in life, so he thinks his father's advice was right. If it worked for him, it will work for Sam. Sam, on the other hand, has self-esteem issues. He expects simple words from his father, "I'm proud of you." But he's never heard them. Sam needs to understand that you can't expect something from someone that they aren't capable of. Henry needs to understand that just because it worked for him doesn't mean it will work for his son. It is unlikely that Henry will understand this. His life is already behind him. His beliefs are fixed, like immovable rocks. To change would mean that his path was a lie. But Sam, if he wants to find peace, must understand because his life is not behind him, but ahead of him. He can't spend his life waiting to receive things from others that they don't even have.

^ Compared to all self help gurus, I have read the least amount of books. Aim for experience instead. You have seen me and others share 100s of tips. Pick 1. Apply it. If it works, great. If it doesn't, figure out what went wrong and fix it. This is what I call Straight Line Breakthrough (actually coined for me by my friend Arthur Dias). Most people are running in loops. They try one advice. It works for some time. Then they get exhausted and fail. Try again. Get exhausted at almost the same point. Fail again. You have to move in a straight line. Start at the point of failure. Figure out what went wrong and go from there, instead of starting from square 1. My book Re-Wire covered this concept in brief. Re-Wire 2.0 will be based around this concept. You'll get the exact technique to put this concept in practice, along with strategies to build focus and discipline. It launched next month. The price will increase by at least 50%. Grab at the lowest price from here: https://re-wire.carrd.co/

Like which books would you prefer?

How to achieve greatness in personality development?

Thread time: https://twitter.com/Based_Realist/status/1574789199613542401

Had an amazing experience today. Yesterday, I had gone to a vegetable lady. Was at her cart for barely 2 minutes. Today, she met my mother and said I have a calm mind. She had that judgement in 2 minutes. Without bragging, it was near to accurate. I don't see people making such accurate judgements these day. They are blinded by their biases. They'll spend hours and yet have a clouded judgement. This clouded judgement affects your life terribly. Because you then use the same clouds to judge yourself. You fail to see the truth. Stop. Work on analyzing people by the way they walk, stand, behave, etc Judging them by their words isn't enough. Improve your judgement over time. It will help you in catching your own bullshit.

Are you constantly bothered by what other people think? Chances are, you're mixing your emotions with other people's emotions. Let me explain. First, you guess their emotional response to your action. It can be anger if you say no to their demands. It can be resentment if you do something they don't is right. It can be amusement at your failure. Etc. This does not exist. It's all your fantasies. Next, you have your emotions. Fear of negative consequences of their anger. Fear of being abandoned. Etc This does exist. And then, you mix it up. You bring life to their emotions that don't exist. Because of your fear of negative consequences, you believe that their anger and resentment exists. Because the fear is sourced from it. For the fear to exist, the anger has to exist. So, how do you solve this mess? First, break apart the emotion. Identify what exists and what doesn't. Then, acknowledge those emotions. Stop trying to pretend that those emotions don't exist. It's never going to work that. You have to accept that you're human who can have emotions. Next, break down the emotion. For instance, if you're afraid of negative consequences...list those consequences. Compare it with the possibilities you can achieve if you were to do the opposite. Once you do that, the emotions will lose their strength. And finally, act. Do what you would do in absence of those emotions. Experience the consequences. The experience will completely destroy your fear.

Use this weekend to create a clear image of how you want your life to be like. Most people don't get this right. They have a vague idea of what they want. You need to have a clear idea. If possible, find the reason you want it. This will help you find out what you really want. For instance, if you want a luxurious life for the sake of happiness, ask yourself: Will the happiness from luxury last long? If no, find what can bring you lasting happiness. This can be things like attaining your potential, helping others, etc. Again, I have nothing against having a luxurious life. I use it as an example because it's easy to understand. Coming back to the point, form a clear image of what you want. If you don't, you'll forever be chasing the vague image you have in your mind. You'll be chasing things you don't really want. And will only end up with regret. So, use this weekend well. Take some time out. And get a clear idea of what you want in life.

Alright, you'll have it next month.

This post will be slightly off topic. But if you stick till the end, you'll learn a great lesson. As a content creator, I have been observing a pattern for the past few months. In the self help industry, newer concepts are being introduced. Many originating from older traditions and teachings like the Indian tradition, stoicism, etc. It's first introduced by someone prominent. Or someone becomes prominent by introducing it. Soon, people beat the shit out of it by repeating his words without context. Then someone points out the nuance and calls the whole concept bullshit. Today, I observed this with the concept of "living in the moment". The interpretation should be obvious: Focus on what you're doing now. Don't be too worried about the past or future. But someone had to point out that you can't let go off the past because it's a part of you. Listen to that person mindlessly, and it really makes sense. But then you realize, he's being ridiculous. You're adding nuance for the sake of it. Not to add value. It's not even nuance. It's just an exception to the principle. Exceptions always exist. Try to cover every exception, and you'll have a non-conclusive principle. So, what's the lessons here? One, realize that people will go to any length just to grab your attention. Beware of this shit going on. Never get trapped in these ridiculous arguments. Take your lesson and fuck off. Two, don't be a part of this shit. When you read something where you find the exception, don't get excited and point it out. I see people doing this in my comments all the time. You're simply trying to validate your intellect. To feel superior, without doing anything substantial. Don't fall in this trap. As I have said before, focus on the 99%. Not on these small insignificant things. Believe it or not, they might sound insignificant now. But once you get trapped, then can engulf your entire life. BEWARE.

Social Skills University just added 4 courses to their curriculum SSU is an online school by Ego Driven, Atlas, and Evil Saint. There's no better time. You're getting knowledge on social skills, discipline, fitness and much more. Things that take years to learn. Join now: https://gumroad.com/a/577875891/gldef

Often the want for a simple life is what leads to the most progress. People relate this "want" with a man giving up on his dreams. Similar to how people call a man's life boring when he gives up porn, Netflix, and booze. Nothing wrong with wanting luxury. Especially if you're young, it CAN be a great temporary motivator. But when you're absolutely driven by pleasure, you fail to act. This is for 2 reasons: 1) Your mind is always looking for the fastest way to reach your goals. And "being rich" ain't the fastest way to attain pleasure. It's porn, booze, etc 2) Pleasure reduces your ability to act. The more you're wired for pleasure, the more boring your work gets. You can try every damn technique on earth, but if you find your work to be boring, nothing will work. And the only way to make your work enjoyable, is by wiring your mind to be happy with small things in life. Of course there are exceptions. You'll find people online living a pleasurable rich life. But for one, you don't know them personally. You only see the part of them that they show. More importantly, almost never consider yourself the exception. Chances are, you're part of the 99%, not the 1%. The sooner you realize this, the better. Act in a way that would benefit a mediocre man. And for a mediocre man, it's almost impossible to be engulfed by pleasure and still have the ability to act. Seek a simple life. I am not saying go live in a hut with no electricity. NO. Have the basic modern needs. Earn enough to live in a good house, eat good food, etc etc. Travel if you want to. But don't get too attracted to all the luxury. Luxury creates a fantasy in your mind. The fantasy keeps you trap. It's mind fuckery. The deeper you fall into the trap, the harder it gets to act.

Must watch

Needed this. Thanks for the gold

Never seek pity when you fail. You're wiring your mind to believe that your failure was a tragic event. It wasn't. It was just a roadblock. See it as it is. Don't turn it into trauma. Look for ways to overcome it. Not ways to feel "okay" about it.

This was eye opening. Thank you for the insight.