" ᵐᵉˡᵒᵐᵃⁿⁱᵃᶜ "
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میتونه ثابت کنه که این مسئله واقعیه و این یک شستشوی مغزی اجتماعی نیست و بازی پروپاگاندا برای انتقال افکار سمی از طریق افراده غیرواقعی بصورته ایده ها و زندگی های ابرقهرمانی یا اصطلاحاً related با انسان های قشر سوم به پایین حِرَم طبقه بندی انسان های جهان نیست؟
اگه یه کاکولده بیناموسه کصملخه چاقالی که خودش مادرشو با اسلحه با دستای خودش کشته بود هم میزارم چنل باز داش ولی مطمعن باش هیچکدوم از اینایی که گفتی نبوده😂
i felt alone for a large portion of my life. no matter where i went, it seemed i was standing with only my bones next to me. being young can be a difficult time for a human, especially when the influences you are supposed to have are nowhere to be found. my parents did the best they could while maintaining whatever normalcy was made out to be back then. they fought and argued, but got us to where my brothers and i needed to be. i swear they loved each other at some point during their marriage.
they just forgot how to when we were older. faking it for us was hard to watch, because you see the fault line everywhere they walked. i remember christmases where we opened gifts and laughed and hugged and cried and ate, and were a family. growing up i was never sure what would get me in trouble so i did anything i could.
not for attention, though i guess it could be looked at that way, but i was vehemently trying to get unstuck. being the middle child you develop defense mechanisms by the time you're five or younger. my brothers and i fought like most boys do, though it drove us crazy being around one another all the time, it ultimately strengthened our bond. my confidence was shot by the age of eleven. i had a speech impediment when i was in preschool that lasted until third grade. i never got bullied but i knew i was different. i always fell in love with math and science. there's no greater power than knowledge and i would soak my brain full of anything that sparked an interest. i am sorry that my mother birthed a rebel without limitations or self-control. it took me another twenty years to figure it out after my life was almost taken. i never wanted to be a suit and tie kind of guy. i never wanted the corner office with the million dollar view. i never wanted a fucking thing to be honest but to have my health and a good time at whatever i was doing. i am turning into the man i damn near suffocated and bled dry. i am doing what i love for the first time in my life. to find what you're looking for, you must endure some sort of hell and its fire if that is where you find yourself at this moment. it isn't a death sentence. it is showing you the variety of influences this universe can hand you in order to guide you in the necessary direction. the only promise it gives, is to not always be there holding your hand. you will eventually have to let go, and when you do, may you discover the softest place to rest your starving heart. may you find a distinction between accepting and settling. may you find the reciprocation of your effort. may you find a friend who has traveled behind you and finally caught up. may you find harmony between the spirit and your desires. i hope you never have to go through this place without experiencing some type of hardship. it is there you will find a backbone strong enough to withstand the gravity forcing the unexpected onto you. may you find someone good enough for you to remove anything resembling the person you no longer wish to be. may it be today. may it be now. life is about knowing who you are and fighting to remain different.
Zachry K. Douglas
