шрам

There are days when I feel like there's nothing about myself that I can truly love. I look at my face and find things I wish were different. I look at my body and struggle to feel comfortable in my own skin. Even my personality becomes something I criticize, something I wish I could change completely. It's exhausting to feel like I'm constantly disappointed in the person I am. I hate how easily I notice every little thing I dislike about myself, how one thought can ruin my entire mood, and how difficult it is to see anything good when my mind is so focused on everything I consider wrong. Sometimes, I wonder what it would be like to exist without constantly judging myself, to look in the mirror without feeling the need to change something, and to speak without overthinking every word that comes out of my mouth. The worst part is that I don't always know where this hatred comes from. I just know that some days, being myself feels harder than it should.

Sometimes, I wonder if I truly deserve the good things in my life. The people who care about me, the kindness they show me, and the little moments that make me happy. I look at everything I have and somehow feel like I'm not worthy of any of it. I keep asking myself what makes me deserving of love, attention, or even someone's time. I notice every flaw, every mistake, and every little thing I wish I could change about myself. No matter how hard I try, I always find another reason to feel like I'm not enough. Sometimes, even when people reassure me that I matter, there's still a part of me that refuses to believe them. I wonder what they see in me that I can't see in myself, and whether they'd feel the same if they knew every thought I keep hidden. I'm tired of questioning my worth, of feeling like I have to be better, kinder, or more interesting just to deserve the things other people receive without even thinking about it. I wish I could look at myself without immediately noticing everything that's wrong with me. I wish I could accept kindness without feeling guilty, and believe someone cares about me without wondering what I've done to deserve it.

When someone I care about hurts me, all I can say is, “I wish you hadn’t done that.” Of course I’ll forgive you, darling, but things will never feel the same between us again, and eventually, this connection will slowly come to an end.

There was something strangely tender about the way his eyes lingered on hers, as if they held a thousand unspoken words, and he had all the time in the world to read them.

Sometimes, I feel like there's nothing I'm truly good at. Not even the simplest things seem to come naturally to me. I watch people find their talents, create beautiful things, and make everything look effortless, while I struggle to find even one thing that feels like mine. And eventually, all I can do is lie in bed and stare at the ceiling for hours, wondering if there's anything special about me at all. Not because I want to give up, but because I'm tired of searching for something within myself that I can't seem to find.

“Even when everything comes to an end, something of life remains.” ☥

Some nights, the ceiling knows more about my insecurities than anyone ever will.

It's strange how you can exist for years without finding a single thing that makes you feel exceptional.

Everyone seems to have something. I just have too much time to think about what I lack.

Perhaps the most exhausting thing is watching everyone become someone while you're still trying to figure out who you are.

No remarkable talent. No obvious purpose. Just a mind that never knows when to be quiet.

Blame it on me Or my self-esteem...

She was like a lily, beautiful and poisonous.

And who would wait?

Break my neck and leave me bleeding..

I hate longing, waiting, and all the beautiful things that only seem to exist in my imagination. It feels like spending so much time missing life that I forget to actually live it. And somewhere between wishing, waiting, and dreaming, I keep losing moments I could have been happy in.

“Enough” is such a heartbreaking word. Like, “Maybe I was never enough.”

"My mind is full of things I'll never say, and my heart is tired of keeping them."