bluehour.

always worse than what i think i can handle.

bad day bad day bad day

ah really?

yesyes name changed. this is barenote. its the last time i swear 😭

nikaal dungi sabko

do not ignore me in my own channel.

its me and the anticipatory anxiety racing through my veins at the end of day.

its a toxic love hate relationship. always betrayed but always looking for it for its what keeps me going.

i hope a lot for someone whose “maybes” have never been.

+4 hours pending classes (yesterday's)

it's genuinely so concerning how everyone has been convinced that hanging out every 3 days and spending 3k+ every time is somehow the norm now? and i'm not even talking about rich kids. i'm talking about kids from very middleclass families and sometimes even below that, constantly asking their parents for money and then resenting them or finding them restrictive when they're not given enough for yet another hangout. eating out every other day, ordering food constantly, spending thousands every time you go out, none of this is a basic requirement of having a social life!!? it's geniunely so insane how we've normalised a lifestyle that a lot of families cannot even sustainably afford, all because social media makes it look like everyone is living this way. and no, you do not need to spend 2k every time you meet your friends to have a good time. what happened to just hanging out? its not oh kids are spending money bla bla, its about how aggressively high consumption lifestyles have been normalized.

i cannot simply turn my thoughts into one-liners,so there will always be a long para,even when there may not be a need for one,or when the thought could be expressed or concluded more briefly.but i like expressing my thoughts in a longer, more detailed way-

hot take: everything i say is so hawt.

hot take: organic chemistry can fuck itself.

it's like returning at the scene of crime, where im the crime and victim, reaping what I sowed.

why care today when it'll be there tomorrow and the days to come?

why feed the despair that only grows stronger by the day?